I'm abandoning a "good man" because of five words.
My name is Sarah, I am 39 years old, and in three days I will be signing the divorce papers.
My mother is crying on the phone. My friends are shocked.
"Are you sure? Marco doesn't drink, he's not cheating on you, he has a stable job, and he's even the coach of the children's soccer team..."
That's true. Marco is a good man.
But I'm not abandoning a bad man.
I'm firing an incompetent employee.
What's the problem?
One sentence.
Just one, repeated for twelve years, drop after drop, until my nervous system collapsed:
"Honey, just tell me what to do."
Marco "helps". But only if I tell him to help.
If I ask, she'll put the dishes in the dishwasher.
He picks up the children from school if I send him a reminder.
She does the laundry, but every time she asks, "Which program should I use?" and "Where's the detergent?"
I think so.
I'm the CEO of the family. He's the intern who, after ten years, still doesn't know where the rolls of toilet paper are.
The last straw was last Tuesday.
We were having dinner. He, looking at his cell phone, said to me:
"Hey, it's my mom's birthday on Sunday. What did we get her?"
What we achieved.
My fork touched the plate.
His mother, not mine. However, for him, it was up to me to remember the date, find the gift, buy it, wrap it, and sign the card.
He just needed to show up and eat cake.
I didn't scream.
I looked at him and asked:
"What shoe size does our daughter wear?"
Silence.
What is our son's teacher's name?
Nothing.
When does the insurance for the car you drive every day expire?
Silence.
"How old is your mother on Sunday?"
He hesitated. He needed to tell her.
Then he got offended.
"But you're exaggerating! You only had to tell me and I would have gone!"
And that's exactly the point:
"You had to tell me."
This is the invisible effort.
That's the mental load.
It's about living with the mindset of a couple.
It's like carrying the whole family's map on your shoulders, while the other person enjoys the view.
I am tired.
Tired of being the only one who notices when the milk is gone.
Only he knows when the dog needs vaccinations.
The only one who holds everything together. Him too.
I no longer want to be a mother with an endless to-do list.
I want to be a woman again.
I prefer to face difficulties alone, rather than feel alone next to someone who "helps," but who in reality weighs me down like a backpack full of stones.
Will I be a single mother? Yes.
But I will no longer be my husband's mother.
I don't need an assistant.
I need a partner.
And unfortunately, the only ones who truly understand this difference... are those who are too tired to explain it again
UPDATE ON MY NEIGHBOR THAT ARRESTED HER HUSBAND 😭😭
Apparently, her late dad left her a piece of land because she’s the only girl among 4 brothers. The boys got houses and other properties, while she got the land.
After she got married 2 years ago, she innocently showed her husband the land documents and even took him there herself 💀
Yesterday, she went to the land because she had been saving to build small rental apartments…
Only to meet people already laying the foundation 😭😭
After asking questions, she discovered her own husband had secretly sold the land to one of his friends — a guy she even knows personally.
Sis didn’t argue.
She didn’t shout.
She didn’t ask for explanation.
She went straight to the police station 🚔
The whole compound is in shock because these people have never even quarreled before 😂
This one sweet me 😭
@Osi_Suave Osi Suave, for years women’s efforts have been written off and downplayed. It’s time for everybody to start putting their names please. Let’s really know how men have been “providing”
The provider narrative when there’s no provision needs to be confronted by the truth.
I would advise getting the tests done somewhere else for confirmation, then allow the doctors to explain the diagnosis to her properly in their own professional way.
After that, support her emotionally. Get her a therapist if needed, or just be present for her.
Also, don’t make the conversation sound like her life has ended, tell her about the options available if she decides she wants to be a mother in future….there is surrogacy, adoption, and even medical advancements like womb transplants.
But most importantly, remind her that womanhood is not reduced to having a womb. She can still live a full, beautiful and meaningful life. She can contribute to society in her own way, she can become a great teacher who mentors children, a scientist, a doctor, an artist, a leader, or whatever she wants to be.
Blue is 100/100. They make the money…When it comes to protection, they share the umbrella equally. Their relationship is strictly professional.
Green, the woman makes the money. Maybe not much, but enough to get by. She’s a very important aspect of the family, hence why the husband protects her more, even at his own detriment.
Red, the man makes the money. The wife does the protection and still protects herself while doing so, because the money makes her feel secure.
Yellow, the husband makes the money, albeit not much, but they are content and he still does the protection with his wife. The wife can protect herself, but would rather rely on her husband’s protection.
I want to be 4 😩
But 1 is the goal.
My baby was 5 months old when I started noticing build up of white substance on her tongue. I was told to clean her tongue with cotton wool and warm water which I did daily but it kept getting worse.
Shortly, the white substance started turning black and two days later, my daughter’s tongue was completely black. I was so scared my husband and I rushed her to the hospital. We saw a doctor who prescribed Nystatin drops for us to drop on her tongue 4 times daily.
I started using it and there was slight improvement but we kept going back and forth, one day, it seems like it’s working and the next, it’s like nothing is happening. I got so worried and started crying which prompted my husband to call his mum.
Mama came, met me crying and just laughed. She said the solution is the sap of a tree and we can only get the sap early in the morning before sunrise.
I was so uncomfortable with the whole thing but I needed a solution. The next morning, she came with the sap and cleaned the tongue herself, and by afternoon of same day, the black lining was beginning to peel off as she sucks.
I was the one that woke my husband the next day to go get the sap and by the 3rd day, my baby’s tongue was back to normal.
There are traditional ways to some things, you just have to find a balance.
Let me put it in perspective if you still don’t know how ridiculously bad and incompetent this government is;
The five naira note is useless.
The 10 naira note is useless.
The 20 naira note is worthless.
The 50 naira note can only buy a sachet of water and gum.
N100? Three sachets of water.
N200 can’t buy one egg.
How about the highest naira denomination?
N1,000 cannot buy bread.
N1,000 cannot buy sardines.
N1,000 cannot buy a liter of fuel.
N1,000 cannot buy a liter of juice.
N1,000 cannot buy a plate of street food.
So, for a poor Nigerian to be able to feed at least 2x a day, they’ll spend between 3-7k (note: I’m talking about poor Nigerians here). Let’s assume they spend 4k per day on food. 4,000 × 30 = 120,000 monthly.
Where do you think they’ll be able to see that kind of money, only for food?
Tinubu must go, and it shall never be well with all of you supporting this government. You’ll ask God for peace and prosperity, and He will forsake you. 🙏🏾
@HonitelHQ Just got my inhaler today. This thing used to be 5k just 3 years ago. On average, it lasts 2 months. I'm so angry. People do not understand how deep the situation we are in actually is����
I’ve been talking to this girl for over two weeks, and she agreed to go on a date with me yesterday. She chose the restaurant herself, which I didn’t mind. In my head, I already had plans for how the night would go I liked her and wanted to sleep with her, since we’ve been talking about it already and I’ve been giving her signals which she was aware of it but she started acting oblivion.
I got to the restaurant before she arrived. When she finally came, she brought a friend along, which surprised me because she hadn’t mentioned it. Still, I didn’t make a big deal out of it. In my mind, I was thinking I needed to get value for the money I was about to spend.
After we were done with the date gimmick, I told her that she and her friend should come with me to my place in Osapa London so we could spend the night together. I didn’t sugarcoat it I said it directly, even at the table. She got upset and said I was embarrassing her.
At that point, I felt like she and her friend were trying to take advantage of me, so I decided to outsmart them. I had budgeted 300k for the date, but when the bill came, it was around 600k. I asked the waiter to split the bill mine separately, and theirs together.
My bill came to about 110k, which I paid. When it was time for them to pay, she started complaining. I then confronted her to pay she and her friend’s bill, and it turned into a scene that lasted about 20 minutes. Eventually, I managed to leave the place and went outside, leaving her there.
When i got home yesterday I didn’t bother to ask how she and her friend cleared the bill 🤣🤣, she started cussing me sent many voice notes, text and calls which I didn’t pick so she ended up blocking me.
In my opinion, if she wasn’t interested in anything beyond the date, she shouldn’t have tried to run up such a high bill.
You’ve been at home for 7 months and luckily a lady referred you to her place of work, because she works well and the manager likes her, they didn’t even stress you… The interview was just a formality.
You joined the company finish, but you started misbehaving.
Every morning as early as 6am, you join NSPPD without earphones. you turn the place to NSPPD branch ..
Work, you won’t do, they have to be chasing you with calls to do handover because you’re busy streaming NSPPD.
Phone on loudspeaker, shouting “Amen! Die! Die! Die!” “What God cannot do doesn’t exist, it is over”
while residents are still sleeping… you no allow landlords sleep
Staff complained, you said it’s only witchcraft that complains about prayer…
They got tired and whistleblew to the company.
On Monday, the manager visited the home unannounced and met you in full deliverance mode 💀
Shouting “It is over! What God cannot do does not exist!”
The audacity 🤦♀️🤦♀️
Now they’re asking:
Who is dying??
What is over??
Who’s shouting on the phone??
Why are you shouting??
Why did you abandon your duty??
Yoy cannot answer, you are were looking like a head of goat that was abandoned
Now they’ve sacked you.( won ti le e danu)
you now have all the time to pray without interruption..
Innocent company don get PTSD for Nigerians , they don’t want to employ Nigerians again…
One person’s behaviour has affected others.
When my friend told me this yesterday, I was so pained… 😔
That rubbish behaviour has affected my friend now because the company was supposed to sponsor her but they’re giving excuses.
She said if there’s anything she regrets in this life, it’s referring that olori gbeske girl
As a practicing nurse, I’ve encountered many patients living with sickle cell...teenagers, young adults, even older adults. And I’ll be honest, in those moments when they’re in severe crisis, battling intense pain, I sometimes catch myself looking at their parents with quiet judgment… like you played a role in this. I never say it out loud, but the thought crosses my mind.
But there was one case that stayed with me.
A young teenager came in during a crisis...severe pain, plus other complications. It was heartbreaking to watch. What made it more intense was the father. He was always there, constantly complaining...about the nurses, the doctors, everything. The tension was already high.
One day, I couldn’t hold it in anymore. As politely as I could, I asked him,
“Didn’t you know your genotype before getting married?”
He hesitated, then said, “You know how it is when you’re young… we were in love. The relationship wasn’t even that serious at the time.”
I just looked at him.
Because beyond the emotions, beyond the love story...there’s now a child living with the consequences of that decision.
And the truth is, there are still people out there today...couples who both know they are SS...yet they hold on to the belief that love will somehow override biology, that things will just “work out.”
But this isn’t one of those situations where hope alone is enough.
Love is important, yes...but so is responsibility.
Know your genotype before that love turns sour.
Meet Segun.
Salary: ₦200k/month.
Lives in Ikorodu.
Works in Lekki.
One of the bosses at his office is getting married in Benin.
Segun thinks:
“If I don’t go, it will look somehow.”
So he prepares.
Aso-ebi: ₦70k
Shoes: ₦30k
Transport: ₦60k
Hotel: ₦30k
Total: ₦190k
For someone earning ₦200k.
He comes back from the wedding with:
• souvenirs
• pictures,
• zero money
Now he has to borrow from Opay just to survive the month.
Next month he can’t repay.
Then the loan app starts calling:
his boss
his siblings
his contacts
All because Segun didn’t know how to say “No.”
Some financial problems are not caused by low income.
They are caused by expensive social pressure.
Live below your income.
Save.
Invest.
Build skills.
Not every invitation deserves your money.
People with bad parents often don't know it.
When they get married, their spouse sees it
One of the signs of having terrible parents is made evident when they take offence over their son-in-law or daughter-in-law not calling to greet them or visiting in person to pay them constant obeisance.
Good parents would call and greet their child and his or her spouse
Bad parents would insist their child and his or spouse must be the ones to call them as a sign of respect
Overbearing parents will keep complaining to their child that his or her spouse did not greet them or show them any regard, thus mounting pressure on their child to make an issue of it
Their child will make an issue of it, and this even makes the spouse more determined to keep his or her distance from them
Good parents and in-laws lead with love and understanding
Bad parents and in-laws demand respect
Adults are doing diets and running every morning, but we are packing 10 cubes of sugar into our children's pap. We are inviting type 2 diabetes to a party that hasn't even started and we need to have a serious conversation about our children.
In Nigeria, we have turned a fat child into a sign of wealth, and a slim child into a sign of suffering.
When a child is dangerously heavy, items always "leave him, it is just baby fat, he will outgrow it." But we are making a terrible mistake. We are overfeeding our children out of love.
You will mix a small bowl of pap with 10 cubes of sugar. Or pack sugary drinks, chocolates, and junk inside their school lunchboxes every single day. We are turning their bodies into sugar houses.
Inside that child you are proudly calling healthy and chubby, the heart might be struggling, and the blood pressure rising.
We are punishing a tiny body that is just starting to grow.
Please, let us do better.
- Practice portion control.
- If your child is full, stop forcing them to eat.
- Reduce the sugar drastically, and give them fruits as snacks instead of biscuits and sweets every day.
Your child needs exercise too! It is not always "go inside and sleep" or "sit down and watch cartoon."
Let them run. Let them play. Let us raise a healthier generation. Happy World Obesity Day!
2021: No salary increase
2022: No salary increase
2023: No salary increase
2024: No salary increase
2025: No salary increase
2026:
Employee: “Kindly accept my resignation.”
Boss: “But you’re doing such a great job! Why are you leaving?”
Employee: “I’ve received a new job offer with a 65% salary increase, and there’s also a guaranteed annual raise based on performance.”
48 hours later…
Boss: “We’ll also give you a 95% raise—just don’t leave!”
Employee: “Sorry, it’s too late now.”
Lesson for Leaders:
Employees don’t leave only because of money—they leave when they feel undervalued or unappreciated.
Retaining good employees isn’t just about increasing their pay; it requires recognition, growth opportunities, and proactive leadership.
Take care of your best employees— before they decide to leave you.
When my neighbor’s husband lost his job, she started selling food in front of their house.
Small cooler. Plastic chair. No pride.
Some people said she was “strong.”
Others whispered,
“See how she has turned the man into nothing.”
For two years, she fed the family.
Paid the rent.
Paid school fees.
Even gave her husband transport money for job interviews.
Then her business grew.
She opened a restaurant.
One evening, I overheard something.
Her husband said,
“Now that I’m back on my feet, you should close this thing. My friends eat here.”
She laughed.
He wasn’t joking.
He said,
“A woman shouldn’t be the face of the family’s success. People are talking.”
That night, she refused.
Three months later, he moved out.
Today, she runs two branches.
He tells people she “became too proud.”
Now the street is divided:
Some say she disrespected her marriage.
Others say he couldn’t handle a successful woman.
So let me ask you —
If a woman carries the family when the man falls,
does she owe him silence when she rises?
Or should she shrink to protect his ego?
Instead of reacting emotionally or impulsively, try a smarter approach.
Ask this one calm, strategic question:
✅ “May I understand how this information relates to the requirements or performance expectations of this role?”
That single question does three important things:
1. It keeps the conversation professional
2. It protects your boundaries
3. It signals confidence and awareness
If HR says it’s about availability or flexibility:
✅ “I’m fully able to meet the role’s expectations regarding time, travel, and deliverables.”
If HR says it’s about long-term commitment:
✅ “I’m committed to delivering value and growing within a role where performance is the key measure.”
See the shift?
From a personal question
- to a role-focused discussion
- without confrontation or disrespect
You’re not being difficult.
You’re being professional.
If this helps, retweet it so more people can learn!
This will shock you.
But I will share the story nonetheless.
I once read an article few years ago that when the TV healings became ubiquitous on Nigerian television and many innocent people were falling prey to religious fraudsters, the Nigerian television authority NTA mandated a strict rule that before any ‘supernatural healing’ is broadcasted, there must be an objective, hospital-verified evidence of the illness and cure before and after the purported healing. You had to show hospital evidence that the person was sick before prayers and hospital evidence that the person had been cured after prayers before it can be broadcasted on the NTA. This was to rule out actors, impostors and fraudsters from deceiving people.
Suddenly almost no church/pastor could meet the NTA requirement and they simply started showing their “healings” on their privatised channels where they completely control what they show and nobody verifies what they claim.
It was saddening but interesting at the same time.
Fresh graduates often forget this part when submitting a job application.
Even now, I still see many of my fresh graduate friends sending job applications by email with only their CV attached.
So that you don’t make the same mistake and can move to the next stage of the application process, I’ll share an example of an introductory message below. ⬇️
__
To the Recruitment Team [Company Name],
I'm [applicant's name], a recent graduate who is very interested in [position name] in [company name]. I believe that [company name] is a place where I can develop my potential and make a meaningful contribution.
I graduated from [university name] with a degree [degree] in the field of [major] and have gained a solid understanding of [a brief description of relevant skills or knowledge]. During my studies, I was also active in [relevant extracurricular activities or organizations].
I'm interested in joining [company name] because of [specific reasons why you're interested in the company, such as values, recent projects, etc]. I am confident that with [your expertise or interests] and a high passion for learning, I will be able to contribute significantly to the growth and success of [company name].
I have attached my CV and academic transcripts for further reference. I really look forward to being able to discuss more about how I can bring added value to [company name].
Thank you for your time and attention. I am very much looking forward to the opportunity to join [company name].
Sincerely,
[Applicant's Name]
[Applicant Contact Information]