Daily Comedy

Daily comedy that will put a smile on your face 🙃

[Daily Comedy @QuirkyMessages]

Every novel is a mystery novel if you never finish it.

[Daily Comedy @QuirkyMessages]

You have two parts of the brain, “left” and “right” – in the left side, there’s nothing right and in the right side, there’s nothing left.

[Daily Comedy @QuirkyMessages]

Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until they open their mouths.

[Daily Comedy @QuirkyMessages]

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

[Daily Comedy @QuirkyMessages]

Employee of the month is a good example of how somebody can be both a winner and a loser at the same time.

[Daily Comedy @QuirkyMessages]

I asked my North Korean friend how it was there, he said he couldn’t complain.

[Daily Comedy @QuirkyMessages]

One snowman asks another, “Do you smell carrots?”

[Daily Comedy @QuirkyMessages]

What’s the difference between a new husband and a new dog? After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.

[Daily Comedy @QuirkyMessages]

My friends tell me that cooking is easy, but it’s not easier than not cooking.

[Daily Comedy @QuirkyMessages]

Hedgehogs, eh? Why can’t they just share the hedge?

[Daily Comedy @QuirkyMessages]

You’re not fat, you’re just… easier to see.
99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.

[Daily Comedy @QuirkyMessages]

The New England Journal of Medicine reports that 9 out of 10 doctors agree that 1 out of 10 doctors is an idiot.

[Daily Comedy @QuirkyMessages]

I heard a great joke about amnesia but I forgot it.

[Daily Comedy @QuirkyMessages]

Why don’t cannibals eat clowns? Because they taste funny.

[Daily Comedy @QuirkyMessages]

I am not a vegetarian because I love animals. I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.

[Daily Comedy @QuirkyMessages]

Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won’t expect it back.

[Daily Comedy @QuirkyMessages]

I am originally from Indiana. I know what most of you are thinking: Indiana – mafia.

[Daily Comedy @QuirkyMessages]

My wife and I were happy for twenty years; then we met.

[Daily Comedy @QuirkyMessages]

The best thing about good old days is that we were neither good nor old.

[Daily Comedy @QuirkyMessages]

The person who invented autocorrect should burn in hello.