Real Housewives N16

What happens on Church Street, stays on Church Street. Or maybe not? Welcome to the lives, loves and paint charts of the Real Housewives of Stoke Newington.

[Real Housewives N16 @RHStokey]

@thepramjam Do you think the coding and baking classes are combined? Because that would be everything.

[Real Housewives N16 @RHStokey]

Peace of the evening once again broken by the neighbour whittling his spoons.

[Real Housewives N16 @RHStokey]

It's so nice that the council have got @HouseofHackney to do the drain covers now. #AllInTheDetails https://t.co/ZocfopafWj

[Hackney Council @hackneycouncil]

Does anyone know where in the borough you can spot this new drain cover design? 🍍

[Real Housewives N16 @RHStokey]

@MsHelenJenkins That'll be The Mary Wollstonecraft Junior Singers.

[Real Housewives N16 @RHStokey]

@thepramjam Oh god, yes. I ended up buying a hideous driftwood draining board out of pity. Agata refuses to use it.

[Real Housewives N16 @RHStokey]

24 moths in the pheromone trap. It might be time to get the cashmere out of the freezer.

[Real Housewives N16 @RHStokey]

@thepramjam Don't I know you from yoga?

[Real Housewives N16 @RHStokey]

Met the woman who's moved in next door. She's a handspinning and knitting consultant. Says she's freelance.

[Real Housewives N16 @RHStokey]

You'd think Rachel invented Puglia.

[Real Housewives N16 @RHStokey]

Gudrun's wandering about offering her home made elderflower ice lollies like Lady Liberty with her torch.

[Real Housewives N16 @RHStokey]

Just to warn you, there appears to be someone in Clissold Park with a cockerpoo called Tapenade.

[Real Housewives N16 @RHStokey]

@clissoldpeople Glad to hear it. Pace yourself and don't get into any fights with Finsbury Park.

[Real Housewives N16 @RHStokey]

13 moths in the pheromone trap. A promising start to the day.

[Real Housewives N16 @RHStokey]

Park's been drinking. https://t.co/iSxxTehjST

[Clissold Park Users @Clissoldpeople]

@@ho@oP

[Real Housewives N16 @RHStokey]

Esme's been to a Ted Talk. I've painted my eyeballs on my eyelids.

[Real Housewives N16 @RHStokey]

Obviously delighted You're Beautiful acquired the apostrophe, but they seem also to have acquired fingerprint ID. Bit much for a spray tan.

[Real Housewives N16 @RHStokey]

The recycling's 80% rosé bottles. Pretty.

[Real Housewives N16 @RHStokey]

Only seven moths in the pheromone trap today. Disappointing.

[Real Housewives N16 @RHStokey]

Someone needs to tell Rachel not having a TV doesn't necessarily make you interesting. Seeing her at yoga later.

[Real Housewives N16 @RHStokey]

Gudrun thinks she's so fabulous, and yet there she is ordering cappuccinos after 10am. Oh dear.