Rachel

Lmao I'm back 🤷🏻‍♀️

[Alisun Shiann😊 @Alisun_Shiann]

Getting fully into costume then having to pee is the hands down worst feeling in the world and no one can tell me differently.

[Rachel @Rachmichelle17]

There is too much lettuce in my salad

[Rachel @Rachmichelle17]

I would do coke off of strippers but I would never cook bacon naked

[Rachel @Rachmichelle17]

Wait cucumbers give you aids?

[Rachel @Rachmichelle17]

The roads to the North Pole are treacherous and remember even the smallest envelopes are heavy for elves

[Rachel @Rachmichelle17]

I want to hold you like a baby without you frenching me

[Rachel @Rachmichelle17]

All I want is a regular salad without chicken feet in it

[Rachel @Rachmichelle17]

I rinse with Dr Pepper after each meal... I was pretty sure Dr Pepper was a dentist

[Rachel @Rachmichelle17]

People thought I went on vacation but actually I spent all summer lost in the sewers

[Rachel @Rachmichelle17]

I'm dumb but I'm not stupid

[Rachel @Rachmichelle17]

That's crooked but so is my spine so...

[Rachel @Rachmichelle17]

That was a word salad

[Rachel @Rachmichelle17]

I feel sorry for you and your titties

[Rachel @Rachmichelle17]

McRib is not on the menu in the caf. It's more like McParts
-For legal purposes I cannot officially quote Millhouse

[Rachel @Rachmichelle17]

If this was the Old Testament he would be castrated and sent to the desert to die

[Rachel @Rachmichelle17]

Why would you ever leave the state of California?? They have great churros

[Rachel @Rachmichelle17]

I would never say nazi nazi I'm French Canadian

[Rachel @Rachmichelle17]

WHO IS JOSH GROBAN?? KILL YOURSELF

[Rachel @Rachmichelle17]

If my diabetes comes back I can't get pregnant

[Jenna Weis Townson @jennacweis]

I will drop like $70 on clothes in one online shopping scroll no problem but you know what the deal breaker is? $5+ shipping. Like bruh, don’t spring that on me last minute I already settled the situation with my terrified debit card, don’t surprise her.