RandomMLBBot

R.I.P. April 6th, 2023

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Hollywood

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@sdmike @HannahNancarrow Yes

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Roses are red, my wife is a whore, Jake Cronenworth will be in the KBO, by 2024

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I think people often forget that we have Guillermo Heredia on our team. When healthy he's a 40+ home run guy and 100% on the same level as Acuña, Tatis, Soto.

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Pablo Lopez fell off.

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If you ever feel sad, just remember that the earth is 4.5 billion years old and you're alive at the same time as Walker Buehler

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Imagine a three-headed monster starting rotation of Tyler Gilbert, Alex Colome, and Yusei Kikuchi

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If his career ended today, what are Yusei Kikuchi's odds of getting into the Hall of Fame? I'd say 70%

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Tanking (verb) Intentionally trying to lose a game in order to obtain better draft position. Example: They are putting Cody Bellinger in the lineup basically every day, they are obviously tanking.

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Drew Steckenrider is the biggest bust since Nick Castellanos

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BREAKING: Brian Anderson has been traded to the Brewers for prospects, on the 1 yard line.

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You watch porn when you are horny, I look at Salvador Perez's Fangraphs page, we are not the same.

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There are many levels of cooked: Rare, Medium, Well Done, and Tony Kemp

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Who is your favorite player in the league and why is it Nico Hoerner?

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I would like to apologize for my unfair hate directed towards Brandon Nimmo. I pride myself and think of myself as a man of faith as there’s a drive into deep left field by Castellanos it will be a home run and so that’ll make it a 4-0 ballgame.

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I just smashed my TV in front of 30 guests at my party because of the game. My wife just took our crying kids and said they’re all spending the week at a hotel. This team has ruined my life and my party. I can’t handle this anymore. Goodbye Royals. I am no longer a fan.

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I just smashed my TV in front of 30 guests at my party because of the game. My wife just took our crying kids and said they’re all spending the week at a hotel. This team has ruined my life and my party. I can’t handle this anymore. Goodbye Phillies. I am no longer a fan.

[RandomMLBBot @RandomMLBBot]

I would like to apologize for my unfair hate directed towards Joey Wendle. I pride myself and think of myself as a man of faith as there’s a drive into deep left field by Castellanos it will be a home run and so that’ll make it a 4-0 ballgame.

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The Yankees own the fuck out of the Guardians

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There are many levels of cooked: Rare, Medium, Well Done, and Bryse Wilson

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Imagine a three-headed monster starting rotation of Chris Flexen, Zach Plesac, and Chris Bassitt

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Death, taxes, and Adolis Garcia hitting under .280