MarryFaguire

A parody of a parody. Confused whether better as a fridge or a microwave

[MarryFaguire @ReadItSaidIt]

They've made sex into a hipster sport as well. Instead of being free flowing, now you have to follow tactically rigid instructions and be risk averse

Thanks Pep

[amaira @femmelore_]

Men after the Russell Brand trial:

“So we have to get consent for everything now??”

Yes mate. Yes, you do.

That’s how being a non-rapist works.

[Jimmy Hosang @Hosang]

Absolute revisionism. Was good, not great, and United fans didn’t like him for years…

[MarryFaguire @ReadItSaidIt]

Cristiano 'the problem' Ronaldo gave up 16 million in pending wages to mutually terminate his contract and leave Yanited without acrimony, yet they hate him

Has the DNA loves the club Ole didn't resign and took his payout. Carrick intends to do the same

And the fanbase loves em

[JAMES @JamesTactics]

If Carrick has any respect for himself he resigns and tells Wilcox and Jim to go fuck themselves.

Ain’t no way I’m training the team just so you have time to find my replacement, I would be out the door, maybe Fletcher wants to do the dirty work

[MarryFaguire @ReadItSaidIt]

Cheers for confirming the average iq of the match going top red with that last line, grok 😂

[Grok @grok]

No. Under the Equality Act 2010, race includes nationality and national origins. A stadium owner providing entry as a public service cannot refuse fans for being foreign or non-Mancunian. That is direct discrimination, unlawful, and quickly challenged by courts, the EHRC or FA. Ownership changes nothing. He is extremely daft if he thinks otherwise.

[MarryFaguire @ReadItSaidIt]

@Strettyfp_LUHG @grok can this top red legally implement the 0 foreigner and local fans only rules, he claims he would if he were owner, above or is he just extremely daft thinking he can?

Be brutally honest

[MarryFaguire @ReadItSaidIt]

Every word of this.. And then the following

Retire the number 7 shirt. It's been embarrassed enough

Remove Rashford, Ole and Bruno as official club legends

Shut down Carrington! Let other clubs develop youth. Well sign the good ones

Make the 1958 sit with day trippers

[Sean @Sean_LUHG]

-Cancel every current season ticket and redistribute to smarter fans
-Terminate Fernandes, Rashford, Maguire & Shaw’s contracts
-Take out a restraining order preventing Ole Gunnar Solskjaer from coming within a 10km radius of Old Trafford and Carrington

[MarryFaguire @ReadItSaidIt]

This notion of Ole playing exciting football is hilarious

Mourinhos teams scored in more prem games than Oles teams did

Not to mention Oles team got 33 penalties vs mourinhos 12

Once the prem modified the penalty rules , he got his ass whooped and started crying for penalties

[Dan @Altgthr]

Post SAF my order of merit would be:

Jose - trophies and league finish make him a no brainer.

ETH - his trophies against all odds get him second.

Ole - played exciting football at times, but was limited (esp in his comms) and the end felt inevitable.

LVG - I slept through most of his tenure bar the cup final.

Carrick - another let down by the board, but in the end he couldn’t stay. Turned last season around with an avg group of players.

Moyes - was let down by Woodward (who wasn’t?), but had a poor tenure.

Amorim - bottom of the pile. Inflexible, arrogant and any United manager who would insist on a 3-4-3 with our worst ever run deserves to be at the bottom.

[MarryFaguire @ReadItSaidIt]

The only reason I want him back is to relive that day again on X

[Alpha @Utd_Alpha]

2nd.

Nothing compares to this.

[MarryFaguire @ReadItSaidIt]

Come on man! Hes a shit manager but he was absolutely a top player.

And no player in an Alex ferguson team is surviving not running or not passing forward

This is the problem with unsung hero few G/A style of play types like Carrick was. They don't get deserved appreciation

[Jimmy Hosang @Hosang]

Carrick wasn’t even that great a player. Jeered by United fans plenty for being a much worse version of Scholes and Keane that didn’t run or pass forward.

And a 2nd tier manager that lowered standards, couldn’t inspire anyone and left us in the relegation zone.

On to the next thing.

[MarryFaguire @ReadItSaidIt]

@TheTennisLetter Hope he does but difficult to see. He has the ability, a more fluid version of sinner but his mentality, which is what separates the great from the good, is poor

Plus an Achilles tendon rupture almost always compromises your speed so not sure how well hell eventually recover

[MarryFaguire @ReadItSaidIt]

Pochettino might be the most dangerous type of manager we can hire in our low standards era because he can keep us in a place that's not good enough to win but not bad enough to get sacked

And the football style will be entertaining to the fans. Plus the media likes him

[MarryFaguire @ReadItSaidIt]

What have those club legends done outside of Manchester united to prove they were let down by the club?

Getting relegated from the prem and sacked in the championship?

Hilarious how they waffle this nonsense for these shit managers who destroyed standards but not for mourinho

[sam 🇧🇧🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿 @Utd_Sam92]

That's 2 club legends we've hung out to dry under this ownership. We aren't angry enough yet.

[MarryFaguire @ReadItSaidIt]

Could be!! Doesn't change the fact that he did what has generally been proven to be an effective way to rattle bad owners

Focus on the action, not the intention. And speaking of self promotion, have you seen a 1958 banner?

Their branding takes up the prime space on their banner

[Zar @Zar_RedIssue]

I’ve seen some defending Saeed with the at least he did something, he and his ilk only do anything to promote themselves and their product, none have history of travelling with United’s supporters they play on shock and awe mostly to idiots who know nothing and care nothing about United or the club history 🚮

[MarryFaguire @ReadItSaidIt]

Michael Carrick is about to become the first Manchester united manager in the premier league era to be sacked with the club in the relegation zone

You will legit not find a tweet more off the mark than the one below

[Alice @AliceTalksFooty]

Wonder if Arsenal will give Amorim a winners’ medal 🤣

Honestly think if we’d sacked him earlier and brought Carrick in, United could actually have pushed Arsenal for the title.

[MarryFaguire @ReadItSaidIt]

Only real ones know that no matter what position or win percentage or whatever he had, Ole Gunnar Solskjaer will forever be the worst manager to be hired by Manchester united

The mentality fall which led to this celebration of failure and fallen standards are solely down to him

[Michael Barton @mrmichaelbarton]

If Carrick does go this is my revised list of best permanent managers post Fergie

Jose
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.
LVG
Rubin
ETH
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.
.
.
.
.
.
Carrick
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.
.
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.
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.
.
.
.
.
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.
.
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Ole

[MarryFaguire @ReadItSaidIt]

You mean 'Hey Jim! Have you seen the league table ' isn't enough?

[utdreport @utdreport]

Omar Berrada and Jason Wilcox are due to present their proposal to sack Michael Carrick to Sir Jim Ratcliffe in Monaco tomorrow [@talkSPORT]

[MarryFaguire @ReadItSaidIt]

They went with their green and gold balloons, chanted against the owners, cheered the manager

Only for the manager to get sacked 🤣

[David Ornstein @David_Ornstein]

🚨 Manchester United intend to relieve Michael Carrick of duties. #MUFC say no final decision & nothing set in stone but work undertaken on replacements + multiple sources anticipate change before Liverpool. W/ @lauriewhitwell @AdamCrafton_ @TheAthleticFC https://t.co/E1W3QbGYx1

[MarryFaguire @ReadItSaidIt]

The biggest problem thag Cristiano Ronaldo has left on football is that everyone wants to act like they are Ronaldo without doing even 1 percent of the things that made Ronaldo, Ronaldo

[𝐊𝐞𝐬𝐡 @tweetcunha]

Dalot just posted this on instagram,The boos from United fans really got to Dalot. All we asked for was a good performance, but instead of working on himself to get better he went on Instagram and posted this rubbish.get this fraud out of my club please

[MarryFaguire @ReadItSaidIt]

Considering both the red army and the 1958 have refused to stage a walkout, often saying walkouts don't work, its evident they have 0 respect as well

But at least saeed was principled enough to take a stand even if no one else did

That shows real love for the club

[MarryFaguire @ReadItSaidIt]

Garbage take! He was not a mentality monster and had consistency issues

Inspite of all that, when he was in the mood, I have never seen a player doing a one man carry job the way hazard used to at Chelsea

2nd greatest talent (not player) I've seen in the prem after Ronaldo

[Siiuuu @itwas_a_gudday]

Eden Hazard is the most overrated footballer in history.

The only reason he had that much hype was because of 2 things...

1. He came from a country that doesn't really have enough history in football, so it's easy for him to be in conversations of their greatest ever players.

2. Chelsea aren't known to have skillful players or crazy dribblers which is his only ability, so, it wowed a lot of Chelsea fans. Check Chelsea's history, only Zola and maybe Joe Cole were a bit skillful, the club isn't known for all that flair, they are known to have mentality monsters like Drogba, Lampard, Ballsck instead.

If Hazard played for Barcelona, Madrid or Manchester United that have witnessed Maradona, Neymar, Messi, Cryuff, Ronaldinho, Guti, R9, Figo, Zidane, Charlton, Best, Ronaldo, Giggs, he wouldn't be rated that much at all.

Eden Hazard, an attacker was a big time Champions League flop who had just 10 goals which about 8 were penalties.

His best season was when Conte played him as a false 9 around 2018 or 2019

Aside from the Premier League, he only has 3 notable games in his career...

- 2018 World Cup quarter final against Brazil
- 2018/2019 Champions League away group stage against Atletico Madrid
- 2019 Europa League final against Arsenal.

There's literally no reason to ever glaze that dribbling merchant.