Red Velvet 🍰 ™️

They’s gaun ask if the cake was named after me.

[Red Velvet 🍰 ™️ @Red_Velvet113]

Be where your feet are.

[Red Velvet 🍰 ™️ @Red_Velvet113]

My great uncles brother was part raccoon

[Red Velvet 🍰 ™️ @Red_Velvet113]

@AIPAC Take your ball and go home.

[Red Velvet 🍰 ™️ @Red_Velvet113]

Looking for a baddie to play with so I can turn off the news and put my phone down.

[Red Velvet 🍰 ™️ @Red_Velvet113]

Running is actually punk rock.

[Red Velvet 🍰 ™️ @Red_Velvet113]

Mrs. Velvet

[Red Velvet 🍰 ™️ @Red_Velvet113]

My wife’s gonna be so hot.

[Red Velvet 🍰 ™️ @Red_Velvet113]

Did the most Irish thing today and worked.

[Red Velvet 🍰 ™️ @Red_Velvet113]

America first.

[Red Velvet 🍰 ™️ @Red_Velvet113]

@APsMullet

[Red Velvet 🍰 ™️ @Red_Velvet113]

Any hot ladies that need dug out after the recent snowstorm, get at me. ❄️ 🚪 ✊🏿 🥾 👢

[Red Velvet 🍰 ™️ @Red_Velvet113]

@RobinhoodApp I’ve donated all year.

[Red Velvet 🍰 ™️ @Red_Velvet113]

Keep it PG. Pretty Greasy.

[Red Velvet 🍰 ™️ @Red_Velvet113]

A good dog on the ground is worth three in the saddle.

[Red Velvet 🍰 ™️ @Red_Velvet113]

@CincinnatiZoo Sure does make me miss Harambe.

[Red Velvet 🍰 ™️ @Red_Velvet113]

3 to do’s

1. Personal Greatness
2. Turn off the news
3. Love thy neighbor

[Red Velvet 🍰 ™️ @Red_Velvet113]

Before enlightenment, chip wood and carry water.

After enlightenment, chop wood and carry water.

[Red Velvet 🍰 ™️ @Red_Velvet113]

What you up too the rest of summer? Let’s hangout @kennychesney

[Red Velvet 🍰 ™️ @Red_Velvet113]

These girls are actually gremlins bruh

[Red Velvet 🍰 ™️ @Red_Velvet113]

As G as I am, if it weren’t for the homies, I would be less G.

Consider it.

[Red Velvet 🍰 ™️ @Red_Velvet113]

Dance floo silly.