Rob in AUS

I'm just this guy, OK?

[Stella Parton @StellaParton]

Yes, I spoke out about the voting machine I cast my vote on the first day of early voting in Tennessee.
Yes, the button kept flipping up to the wrong candidate three times.
Yes, I called on a very nice poll worker who stood there until it worked on the third try.

[BlackRoomSec @blackroomsec]

There are a lot of uncomfortable conversations going on in boardrooms across America and elsewhere this morning.

Leadership is asking questions which make them squirm like

"How come we didn't know we had all these vulnerable software packages in our environment?"

And they're being told, by technical people who are terrified of losing their jobs, facing uncertain futures with all this AI crap and misinformed leadership making increasingly poor decisions which only make things worse, that the reason this is all happening is because for years they were hamstrung and prevented from doing those jobs, BY THAT SAME LEADERSHIP.

Patching.
Updating software.
Documentation.
Asset Management. I wrote a book on it. Check it out.😉

How can you protect your assets if you don't know how many you have and what they are and where they are?

No, you can't have that money in your budget to do your work because we have to use it to spend it on stupid things like tokens.

No, you can't take down a production system in the middle of the day and we're not going to approve any overtime either so figure it out.

Except it wasn't figured out because in order to update it the system needs to be taken offline.

And the technical people need to be able to do those updates without having some megalomaniac breathing down their neck asking the dumbest questions like ETA? 🙄

ETA.

When it gets done, dumbass. That's when.

Is this harsh? Yes.

Once again this is a revealing incident showing that all these companies who love to brag how secure they are, really aren't in reality.

But that is not the fault of the technical staff.

That's the fault of the guys and gals in the top echelon who are supposedly managing all these businesses but doing a very poor job of it.

They never get called out though.

I think we need to change that.

I think all layoffs need to be in a moratorium status because it's clear to me that the very last thing you want to do is get rid of the individuals in your company who are going to help you clean up from all the vulnerabilities which need to be patched in the coming days weeks and months.

Yesterday was a precursor.

A taste of what is to come.

Now is not the time to be laying off those who have the technical skill to help you recover from the fallout.

Stop worrying about vibe coding idiotic projects that aren't going to make your company any money and start worrying about protecting the assets you have today.

Invest in the people whose work got you all that money you are spending on this AI shit and prioritize giving them the tools to make your organization even stronger.

AI models are not alive.

They do not have consciousness now and they're not going to.

Play books that they are running right now are based on human technical experts notes. They aren't inventing anything new.

They are reading what it is we have done in reality and mimicking that.

And they are going to be successful in hacking you because you haven't allowed your technical staff to do their jobs which you hired them to do.

Listen to your cybersecurity staff.

Listen to your information technology staff.

Instead of restructuring your human assets start shuffling around money and shoring up technical budgets so that they can do those jobs properly.

And stop with the bullshit excuses.

Do you want to get sued?

Because that's where this is going to end up if you don't start getting your technical houses in order.

That starts with everything I said above.

And the very first thing that you need to take offline is those stupid AI chatbots that you put on your websites.

Your customers hate them.

They loop.

They want to speak to a human.

And you should try it yourselves.

There's a number of them working for you.

That's how you get paid the ridiculous salaries you make.

How's about talking to them for a change, instead of at them? 🙄

[Rob in AUS @RobInAUS]

@DocBrownLloyd You are a beautiful human, and 88 years is not even close to how long you've been enriching our lives. Thank you for being born!

[Rob in AUS @RobInAUS]

@DanielMCodyWas @FozonCapital @HQNewsNow FOUND THE PEDOPHILE!

[Rob in AUS @RobInAUS]

@cenkuygur @TheYoungTurks At this point, I'd be shocked if you caught any of them with adult women escorts.

[⁵⁄₉ @fiveoutofnine]

So basically, today PHP got two critical bugs that let anyone run code on your server without even logging in, which is bad, and then the details leaked before the patch was even out, which is worse, and it works on WordPress and MediaWiki and Magento and Joomla and Laravel, and Censys says like 1.5 million servers are running a version with no fix, so the NSA was like "take your system offline," and the FBI was like "take your system offline," and CISA and the UK and CERT-EU were all like "take your system offline," and then the Prime Minister of Japan, the actual Prime Minister, posted at 5:55 in the morning telling 48.8 million people to take their system offline, so everyone took their system offline, like the Dutch cybersecurity agency took its own website offline, and the Dutch parliament went offline, and the Port of Rotterdam went offline, and Finland and France and Denmark started pulling government sites, and Wikipedia went down, and https://t.co/QlOXb3COq3 went down, and Asana and GOG and Something Awful went down, and the University of Vienna's webmail went down for some reason, and that's just PHP. Because GitLab also dropped a CVSS 10.0, which is the highest score they give out, for a bug that's been there since 2014, so that's every self-hosted GitLab for twelve years, and then LiteLLM 1.107.0 got hijacked and shipped a credential stealer and a remote access trojan in every single wheel and the Docker images, including latest, and you didn't even have to import it, just installing it was enough, and it's the second time this year, and then Railway paused every deployment on the entire platform because someone got into the environment variables, so now everyone has to rotate every secret they've ever stored there, and TiDB Cloud said someone was walking around inside with stolen credentials for basically a month and an extortion group says they took 10.6 terabytes, and Zeabur got breached for the second time in two months and is just shutting down, like the whole company, and Node.js patched remote code execution and a TLS bypass, and CISA says Plex is being actively exploited, and someone took over 300 Tor exit relays to steal SSH passwords, and SafePay ransomware has hit over 600 critical infrastructure orgs, and India's biggest bank filed a data loss incident, and Japan has been in an official state of emergency in cyberspace since October 9, which honestly explains the 5:55 AM post. Oh, and eMudhra, a certificate authority that's issued over 60 million certificates, whose entire job is proving websites are who they say they are, was supposed to be using private keys that are random numbers over a hundred digits long, and one of them was 4. Just 4. And the others were like 66 and 237. Anyway, it's Wednesday.

[Rob in AUS @RobInAUS]

@Saint_ExPletive @_nomadic_soul Sounds like men are pretty rubbish when they're given power, then. And that throughout history, the greatest enemy of men is other men.

Maybe we should put women in charge.

[Rob in AUS @RobInAUS]

@Covert61 @unkiejayjay @Jane_Doe82 @BenBankas Ain't nobody gonna fuck you, ever.

[Rob in AUS @RobInAUS]

@nlyonne Fucking legend, OK?

[Rob in AUS @RobInAUS]

@JShaffir32914 @Charcuterweed @Clowndro @GlamRatchet Tie me kangaroo down, Chad
Tie me kangaroo down
Keep your wee cock cool, Chad
Keep your wee cock cool
Don't go acting the fool, Chad
And tie me kangaroo down

[Rob in AUS @RobInAUS]

@GlamRatchet I sat in my ute with a snag in white bread
With a red/white stripey 'Kubra sitting on he head
This drongo named Chad came up to my place
With a big stupid grin right over his face.

"These broads are all 3s!" he whined with a sneer.
"Rack off, you prat, they're all quite dear."

[Rob in AUS @RobInAUS]

@Quadcarl @TomArnold 💀 ☠️ 💀 ☠️ 💀

[Rob in AUS @RobInAUS]

@JShaffir32914 @Clowndro @Charcuterweed @GlamRatchet

[Rob in AUS @RobInAUS]

@GlamRatchet Chad tried to mock the 'dro profile, but his linguistic skills weren't up to the job. Sad.

[Rob in AUS @RobInAUS]

@JShaffir32914 @Clowndro @Charcuterweed @GlamRatchet I love wordplay, mocking Dude-bros, and generally taking the piss.

[Rob in AUS @RobInAUS]

@JShaffir32914 @Clowndro @Charcuterweed @GlamRatchet I am Chad. Chad I am.

Do you like "3"s who are glam?

I do not like them, those 3s-so-glam.

Would you like them if they were near?

I would not like them if they were here.
I don't like girls; they're what I fear.
I do not like those 3s-so-glad.
I'm happy being Chad-So-Sad.

[Rob in AUS @RobInAUS]

@Gordon_Bombae9 @PatsKam Gorgeous woman has her profile pic. Loser with a loser's PFP tries to tell gorgeous woman that she's ugly.

Dude-bro, you need to be lonelier.

[Rob in AUS @RobInAUS]

@JShaffir32914 @Clowndro @Charcuterweed @GlamRatchet They can't *all* be bangers!

[Rob in AUS @RobInAUS]

@JShaffir32914 @Clowndro @Charcuterweed @GlamRatchet The Green Eggs and Ham Servo Roll:

Would you eat it in a ute?
Would you eat it in a suit?
Would you eat it with some sauce?
Put it down, don't be a boss!

I will not eat it, Sam-I-Am.
That servo roll’s a cardboard scam.

[Rob in AUS @RobInAUS]

@Clowndro @Charcuterweed @JShaffir32914 @GlamRatchet "choppy waves" is what Sad Chad calls his crinkle-cut french fries.