Robby Slowik

Stand-Up Comic, TV Writer, and Podcast host just like everyone else on this website.

[Robby Slowik @RobbySlowik]

Hi folks, this is my Conan set from last night. I’m proud of it and I hope you like it. https://t.co/wqjCE9l5KY

[Robby Slowik @RobbySlowik]

@RyanLostinTX I’m gonna fix it next season

[Robby Slowik @RobbySlowik]

@ChrisAlanComedy My man missed the bus (it left in 1991)

[Robby Slowik @RobbySlowik]

Wow the entire C-Suite of CVS is now locked behind plexiglass

[Robby Slowik @RobbySlowik]

The thing I like about having Twitter, Bluesky, and Threads is how much I hate myself by the third time I hit “post”

[Robby Slowik @RobbySlowik]

Sorry but if the economy is tanking and the country is in a dystopian capitalist death spiral then why is pretend money more valuable than ever??

[Robby Slowik @RobbySlowik]

Me: It’s a three-day trip. No need to pack much.
My Wife:

[Robby Slowik @RobbySlowik]

I get the symbolism of choosing those words for the bullet casings but a smarter killer would have gone with “IT” “WASN’T” “ME”

[Robby Slowik @RobbySlowik]

These genocide reveal parties are getting out of hand

[Robby Slowik @RobbySlowik]

CEO of Blue Cross started carrying around his Blue Shield

[Robby Slowik @RobbySlowik]

New York is back baby! Mayor Adams for life. Turkish embassies on every corner. Let's fucking go!

[Robby Slowik @RobbySlowik]

1. Murder is bad.
2. People who get multimillion-dollar bonuses for sitting atop billion-dollar empires that inflate healthcare costs and deny medically necessary procedures should still live in constant fear of it.

[Robby Slowik @RobbySlowik]

@KrangTNelson Presidents have to take that picture with everyone they pardon. Maybe read the constitution idiot.

[Robby Slowik @RobbySlowik]

Ok I’m officially done with Twitter now that the new ToS says Brooklyn dads can’t be defiant.

[Robby Slowik @RobbySlowik]

Haven’t been following the muppet guy drama. I’m not into Gonzo journalism.

[Robby Slowik @RobbySlowik]

Yes Biden pardoned his son but don't worry, he's an old school dad. He's gonna make Hunter sit on the board of a whole carton of Ukrainian energy companies.

[Eden Dranger @Eden_Eats]

Happy Deleting Emails From Every Fuckin Store You've Ever Purchased Anything From Weekend!

[Robby Slowik @RobbySlowik]

Vaccines are dangerous? My man you ran for president as a Kennedy. That has a 100% fatality rate.

[Bennington @BenningtonShow]

Coming up at 1pm EAST! ALL NEW NETFLIXMAS with our hilarious friends @robbyslowik and @CaseyBalsham! It's a CHRISTMAS ISLAND party! Listen later on Demand too! Link in BIO

[Robby Slowik @RobbySlowik]

"Our team doesn't drop bars but we do pass them"

[Robby Slowik @RobbySlowik]

Toronto TV gonna be flooded with ads like, "Have you or someone you know been hurt in a rap battle? You may be entitled to compensation."