5 Star Bob

this bio is me apologizing in advance for whatever drunk tweets you may see. Cheers, my beautiful/sad friends. 🇵🇷🇩🇴

[5 Star Bob @RobertBroto]

Whenever people have mimosas with eggs, they call it eating "brunch" but whenever I crack open some beer w/ my poptarts, I'm an "alcoholic"

[5 Star Bob @RobertBroto]

Hey @DojaCat,

Can you please get @McDonalds to bring back the snack wrap? They keep on playing and pretending like we don’t need it. Obviously these companies listen to you, so we would greatly appreciate it, fast food queen!
🥺❤️

[5 Star Bob @RobertBroto]

@222alyssaashley Send the video. I need to see it lol

[5 Star Bob @RobertBroto]

@queenvagine Drinking 4 U!!!🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🥺

[5 Star Bob @RobertBroto]

@SEPTAPHILLY @SEPTA @SEPTA_SOCIAL @SEPTANews PLEASE GO FUCK YOURSELF! Please.

Love,
Absolutely everyone in Philly.

[5 Star Bob @RobertBroto]

@notliamanders0n Excuse me?… you know you have my number

[5 Star Bob @RobertBroto]

@kfc needs to bring back the twister and @tacobell needs the beefy frito crunch back!

@yumbrands get this shit back now!!!
Please ❤️

[5 Star Bob @RobertBroto]

@cm_flunk HAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHA

[5 Star Bob @RobertBroto]

@nastydannyphant 😂😂😂😂😂😂

[5 Star Bob @RobertBroto]

A job with perks is different than a job with percs…👀

…unless you’re a doctor or a drug dealer.

[👼YOU'RE SAFE NOW👼 @ZOMBIESHARK_]

:^(

[Elliot Coleman @elliotcoleman]

It’s an Alice In Chains, stuffed crust pizza, PlayStation demo disc, night.

[Brian Revels @brevelsmusic]

my bagel what’s wrong
🤝
everything

[5 Star Bob @RobertBroto]

This @MariahCarey x @McDonalds collab is making the little chubby kid inside of me very happy. Two of my childhood loves continuing to make me remember why they matter to me❤️

[5 Star Bob @RobertBroto]

@kschweitzer32 @DUALIPA Only if I picked up the barbell and beat someone with it afterwards lol

[5 Star Bob @RobertBroto]

Going to a gym in the gayborhood of Philly is an interesting experience. I’m at my gym benching enough weight to crush the average human, SCREAMING while @DUALIPA is singing her heart away on the radio and I’m trying to not cry because of the music’s relevancy 🥲

[Four Loko @fourloko]

Twenty-Four Loko Days of Giving Case #8 (sorry was having a drink)

RT this post and we'll randomly DM a winner tonight!

[5 Star Bob @RobertBroto]

@samiilynn Or Halloween movie????

[Four Loko @fourloko]

Twenty-Four Loko Days of Giving Case #1

RT this post and we'll randomly DM a winner tonight!