Rogue Bank Tellers

An ode to the joys of customer service. Mostly observations. Operating anonymously out of a WASPy suburban bank near you.

[Rogue Bank Tellers @RogueTellers]

@SWilliamBrown33 Can I move to wherever you can return a used magazine for enough money to pay rent?

[mikkel. @madebymikkel]

My beautiful mom who passed away loved @TheRock so so SO much. I’m trying to get him to do even a video saying her name for the funeral. If you could retweet the crap outta this for him to see it that’d mean the world. Thank you!

[Rogue Bank Tellers @RogueTellers]

“I’m sorry, we don’t have a coin machine.”

#Dearcustomer: “Well that’s not what I expected coming in here.”

I didn’t expect your fistful of sweaty pennies, sir, and yet here we are.

[Rogue Bank Tellers @RogueTellers]

Happy Thursday, Cat Day, and Almost-Friday, fellow retail kittens. Good luck getting through the day, and may your weekend look something like this...

#Thursday #Catday #Retail #Youcandoit

[Rogue Bank Tellers @RogueTellers]

@Work_CrazyTalk Valid. Good people have sticky feet.

[Rogue Bank Tellers @RogueTellers]

I honestly think I'm here doing cross-generational retail penance for my mother's sins after she told a cashier at @MichaelsStores once that he "needed Jesus."

[Rogue Bank Tellers @RogueTellers]

#Dearcustomer: “I’ve banked here for 30 years and you’re asking for an ID?!”

I’ve only been on this planet for 24 — you wanna cut me some slack there, buddy?

#tellerproblems #retail

[Rogue Bank Tellers @RogueTellers]

@RetailVentSpace Related, we have a job opening if you’re interested.

[Rogue Bank Tellers @RogueTellers]

#Dearcustomer: “Do you know how to do a deposit?”

Well actually about 5 minutes ago I was on the corner flipping signs for a mattress store but they brought me in here to cover a few shifts.

[Rogue Bank Tellers @RogueTellers]

Our assistant manager has roof access, but she's holding out on us. She claims to be worried about a "cave-in situation," but we think she might be hiding something.

[Rogue Bank Tellers @RogueTellers]

@OMatyckas We don’t speak of such things. 😶

[Rogue Bank Tellers @RogueTellers]

#Dearcustomer got so upset today when we couldn’t take his enormous bag of loose coin. Bro, don’t you know it’s always better to roll your own?

[Rogue Bank Tellers @RogueTellers]

@candose3 @SWilliamBrown33 Would your bank like a new customer? We have an extra one we can send over.

[Rogue Bank Tellers @RogueTellers]

Gary hasn’t been seen in a few years, but we’re pretty sure his ghost is running the pneumatic tube system now, so that’s cool.

[Rogue Bank Tellers @RogueTellers]

Related, #Thursday might henceforth be #catday. Jury’s still out, but the odds are looking good.

[Rogue Bank Tellers @RogueTellers]

When #dearcustomer is being mean and you go to your happy place:

[Rogue Bank Tellers @RogueTellers]

Guys we found some cardboard tubes out by the garbage and we’re about to have a sword fight.

[Rogue Bank Tellers @RogueTellers]

#Schadenfreude: the sick joy experienced by slowly paying down one’s own crippling student loan debt by selling more debt to other people. You’re welcome.

#tellerproblems

[Rogue Bank Tellers @RogueTellers]

Hey, guy who owns the #Chevron next door: if you’re trying to impress us by pouring liquid soap into your own fountain every night... it’s working.

[Rogue Bank Tellers @RogueTellers]

No, George, the bank does not give out free samples. Thanks for clarifying, though.