Alonzo

Beer me that taco -

[Alonzo @Runnerxc8]

"The gift of a beginner is fresh eyes.

The longer you're in a field, the harder it is to perceive new truths. Your mind is biased toward refining what you're already doing instead of exploring fresh terrain.

Take your expertise and apply it to something new."

[Jayna 💕 @Eras_Resale]

Imagine us all listening to “Cleveland!” by Taylor Swift for the first time and it’s just this

[Dick Cheney’s Ghost @_Reaganite_]

Evergreen.

[𝔏𝔢𝔫𝔞 🎀 @clusterbitch_]

oh my god they’re actually going to crash the fucking economy

[El Diaz @SoyDaniloDiaz]

Todo es urgente en el mundo corporativo, excepto el reconocimiento y el aumento de sueldo.

[Pittsburgh Pirates @Pirates]

Goodnight Bucco fans! 🫂

[Alonzo @Runnerxc8]

Real

[Keeks 🦋 @DietCoke_Esq]

Me and opposing counsel in the hallway giggling before and after we try to convince the judge to sanction the other

[฿₳₮₮ⱠɆ ฿ɎⱤĐ @BattleByrd]

Replied to 3 emails, ate lunch, and left work early...

[Not Jerome Powell @alifarhat79]

Americans: We can’t afford gas, groceries and rent. Can you fix it?

Trump:

[Jamie Bonkiewicz @JamieBonkiewicz]

Me zoning out so I don’t run my fucking mouth.

[Alonzo @Runnerxc8]

Me & my bro watching the Guinness being poured

[the thicc husband & father @lukeisamazing]

how I look at leftover Chinese food in the fridge at 1:47am

[Alonzo @Runnerxc8]

@iloveyoutoye No, it was when she was planning dates behind my back with other people and lying to my face even though I’d seen the proof

[Alonzo @Runnerxc8]

@chai1anya True. A law school professor always said, “It’s not what you know, it’s what you can prove”

[FOX Sports: MLB @MLBONFOX]

The Pirates have officially been eliminated from postseason contention, extending their playoff drought to 11 consecutive seasons.

[Alonzo @Runnerxc8]

@kharis_micheal Less said the better; the rest is a waste of time

[Hank Dave Burner Acc @NotHankDave]

Pirates back to .500 in September

[Sam Tripoli @samtripoli]

We are losing our fucking minds.

[Alonzo @Runnerxc8]

@jxtsummer All while she’s infatuated with another guy

[Rip City Beaver 🦫 @ripcitybeav]

Not since the Tostitos Fiesta Bowl has a bowl sponsor been so on brand.

[Alonzo @Runnerxc8]

@dfwtopski It’s cool; she’s prob just hopeful her other date will go well