Sam Francis

Career career trier currently settled on math teacher. All opinions are someone else's, and he's fucking stupid.

[Sam Francis @SamFranWrites]

So lame how Major League Russian Roulette switched to a 10 chamber revolver just so more players could make the playoffs.

[Sam Francis @SamFranWrites]

If I were the new police commissioner in Philly, the first thing I would do is get a time machine to go back and prevent the massive lead contamination that poisoned the brains of generations of residents. Then maybe like Wacky Shirt Wednesdays for patrol officers.

[Sam Francis @SamFranWrites]

He should put this on the money when he's president again.

[Sam Francis @SamFranWrites]

I've been reading classic sci-fi and it's uninspired. I'm sure it was great in 1955. But most of these guys obviously thought humanity peaked after WWII, so these books are like "Hey it's 9000AD, let's listen to Glenn Miller and smoke Pall Malls while slapping hysterical dames."

[Sam Francis @SamFranWrites]

LPGA golfers will now be forced to have a male drive for them.

[Sam Francis @SamFranWrites]

Since 1999, The Matrix has done more brain damage than all contact sports combined.

[Sam Francis @SamFranWrites]

Okay so no more sporting events in Qatar, right?

"2026 SUPER BOWL AWARDED TO QATAR"

[Jeff @usedwigs]

having a hard time finding a chair tall enough to use with my standing desk

[Sam Francis @SamFranWrites]

I don't know I think this one's real

[Sam Francis @SamFranWrites]

When I subscribed to OnlyFanseses, my favorite message to receive from women was "I'm bored." Oh you're bored? Here's an idea - go make some fucking content. You suckered me into paying you $15 for the month for two grainy pics of your tits, I will not be resubcribing (I did tho)

[Sam Francis @SamFranWrites]

Weird way to get people to buy these things

[Sam Francis @SamFranWrites]

Doc Rivers, Chip Kelly, Dave Hakstol, Joe Girardi

[Barstool Philly @BarstoolPhilly]

Who are your top-4 all time Philadelphia head coaches?

[Sam Francis @SamFranWrites]

because a lot of rural school districts don't pay shit. that's probably important to know.

[Sam Francis @SamFranWrites]

I support this so I can move to a small town where houses cost $85k and live like a fucking Saudi prince.

[More Perfect Union @MorePerfectUS]

Reps. Jamaal Bowman and Frederica Wilson have introduced a bill to pay all U.S. teachers at least $60,000/year.

The U.S. is facing a major teaching shortage — about 45% of public schools have unfilled vacancies.

[Sam Francis @SamFranWrites]

Teddy Roosevelt must be in heaven cracking the fuck up at this or he may be busy choking out wildebeests I have no idea

[Sam Francis @SamFranWrites]

My college football ideal is the 32 most popular teams in one independent league, divided into two conferences with four divisions per conference, and at the end of the year there is one super bowl game after weeks of playoffs. And the players are paid.

[Sam Francis @SamFranWrites]

The fentanyl/cops thing is very now. Cops and cop supporters say you can OD from being with a mile of a speck of the shit, science says "No you can't, drama queenz," cops and cop supporters double down because scientists are liars, as ICP told us many years ago.

[Sam Francis @SamFranWrites]

Most of these kids are just doing it because their ingroup is. Whatevs. I mean in 6th grade I gave myself a rap name, like when Bud Bundy changed his name to Grandmaster B. Because other kids were doing it.

[Sam Francis @SamFranWrites]

I've had three students this month ask me to start using a typically male name and he/him pronouns instead of their deadname and she/her. And I will even though it is just trendy. Because who gives a shit?

[Sam Francis @SamFranWrites]

He quickly removed his pants, revealing a pair of cherry red briefs with text emblazoned on the crotch: "Warning: contains nuts." She had never been more aroused.