Sam

[Sam @SamRylie12]

Check out this listing I just added to my #Poshmark closet: Urban Outfitters Out from Under Velvet Bralette. https://t.co/ypnX4WDn3K #shopmycloset @poshmarkapp

[Sam @SamRylie12]

Propeller | @proplr https://t.co/HHnSnza7kq

[Sam @SamRylie12]

Propeller | @proplr

[Sam @SamRylie12]

@wheatus are you guys adding a Florida tour date though? 👀🤞🏼

[Mayor Guy Fieri @GuyFieri]

Not me. Us.

[prance @bocxtop]

Donald Trump has just been banned from the club penguin public chatroom

[Kyle 🌱 @KylePlantEmoji]

Our father, who art in heaven, baja be thy blast

[Big Tucson Dad @BigTucsonDad]

This is a Street Fighter character and I will not be convinced otherwise

[m@thew @TweetPotato314]

waiter: what’ll it be

the very hungry caterpillar: *deep breath*

[Kieran @kieransofar]

me: what’s todays criminology class on?

friend: cannibalism

me: [gasping] a hannibal lecture

[middleclassfancy @midclassfancy]

When someone asks me how I can eat a jalapeño popper without taking a sip of water

[Sam @SamRylie12]

@marcellzyo

[middleclassfancy @midclassfancy]

When someone asks me how I can eat a jalapeño popper without taking a sip of water

[UnDo 512 @undo512]

me: *wakes up with a ton of anxiety, already shaking*

also me: perhaps.... several cups of coffee?

[Quilliam @nyquills]

[texting]

Me: [1:23pm] yo

Friend: [1:30pm] what's up

Me: [7:45pm] not much, you?

[Rachel @femaleredhead]

*at brunch*

waiter: what can i get you?

friend: bloody mary

other friend: bloody mary

bloody mary in the mirror: ok ok one more cmon

third friend: mimosa

[jordan @JordanUhl]

did i do this right