My grandmother said, “A woman shouldn't be too independent because men don't like feeling unnecessary.” I asked her, “Why should a woman make herself smaller just to make a man feel bigger?” She said, “Because relationships require compromise.” I said, “Compromise is meeting halfway. Giving up your independence so someone else feels powerful isn't compromise.” My father then said, “But every man wants to feel needed.” I looked at him and said, “Then be the kind of man someone chooses even when she doesn't need you.” Nobody said anything after that. And honestly, I think that's the kind of standard more people should have.
You want a submissive wife. Ok... Fine.
Then the plumber says the foundation has a problem.
You freeze.
The school calls about the children. She handles it.
The rent increases. She makes the plan.
Your family creates drama. She sets the boundary.
Something breaks in the house. She figures it out.
But every evening, you remind everybody that you are “the head.”
My brother, leadership no be ceremonial title ohhh.
If your wife has to carry the thinking, planning, emotional regulation, household logistics and crisis management while you carry only authority, you are not leading.
You are occupying a position.
Later you'll be saying she's not opening her legs for you. Oooooook.
You demanded to be the head of the house. Yet you do not know how to operate the washing machine you bought.
You cannot boil water without asking where the salt is.
When your wife gets sick, the entire household logistics collapse in less than 12 hours.
You are just a heavily subsidized dependent with a deep voice.
Weaponized incompetence = embarrassment.
And many of you are on this train of incompetence.
A real man knows the architecture of his own domain. He can step in and run the entire operation seamlessly.
Stop being a burden.
"My fellow Nollywood actors and actresses, let's support our colleague, Actress Maureen Okpoko, who lost her sight years ago. She can see again with the right treatment; all she needs is our support."
— Veteran actor Harry B
Boy math is calling women as "bad
drivers" when in fact men are responsible for 73% of car accidents. Boy math is calling women "emotional" when men are responsible for 90% of violent crimes. Boy math is calling women as "dependent" even though women carry out about three times more unpaid care and domestic work than men around the world. Boy math is calling women as being "overly sensitive" even though women score higher in cognitive empathy in 57 countries. Boy math is calling women "weak" while in most countries men have a significantly shorter life expectancy than women.
You want to stay home, bake sourdough and have 9 kids? Wonderful!
But if another woman wants to go to med school and become the ob-gyn who helps you deliver those 9 kids, you don't get to guilt or shame her for HER CHOICE.
We are writing with heavy hearts to cry out for help.
42 children from Mussa Primary and Junior Secondary School, Askira Uba LGA, Borno State were abducted on May 15, 2026. The children include toddlers as young as 2 years old.
Today marks 67 days and our children are still being held in the forests. We have not heard anything about their whereabouts or condition.
We have waited, we have prayed, and we have reported. But up to today, we have not seen concrete action from the Borno State Government under Governor Babagana Zulum to secure their release and bring them home safely.
Our children are in the forest. They are scared, hungry, and in danger. Every day that passes puts their lives at more risk.
We are pleading:
1. Governor Zulum: Please act now. Deploy all necessary resources for the immediate rescue of the 42 Mussa children.
2. Security agencies: We need a coordinated rescue operation urgently.
3. The public and media: Help us amplify this. Do not let our children be forgotten.
We are parents, we are a community, and we are desperate. We cannot do this alone.
Please, help us call on the authorities to act before it is too late. Our children deserve to come home.
Thank you for standing with us.
Sincerely,
Concerned Parents and Community Members of Mussa, Borno State, Nigeria.
It’s been 65 days since 42 students, young children full of dreams for the future, were abducted from their school in Askira-Uba, Borno state. The silence surrounding the case is a painful slap on all our faces. We demand to know what their situation (and that of many others) is!