junior pm: i have to run my first global alignment meeting and i'm freaking out
senior pm: what's your plan?
junior pm: schedule the call, walk everyone through the proposal, get buy-in
senior pm: how many people?
junior pm: like 8 stakeholders across 4 time zones
senior pm: and you're meeting them for the first time... in the alignment meeting?
junior pm: well yeah. that's the point of the meeting
senior pm: there's your problem
junior pm: what do you mean?
senior pm: alignment meetings don't create alignment
junior pm: then what's the point?
senior pm: they confirm alignment you already have
junior pm: i don't follow
senior pm: have you talked to any of these 8 people yet?
junior pm: i sent them the pre-read
senior pm: that's not talking
junior pm: so i should... call them first?
senior pm: every single one. 1:1. before the big meeting
junior pm: that's 8 separate calls just to prep for 1 meeting
senior pm: now you're getting it
junior pm: seems like a lot
senior pm: it's the whole job
junior pm: what would i even say in these calls?
senior pm: you're not saying. you're listening
junior pm: listening to what?
senior pm: their fears. their motivations. their hidden objections
junior pm: why wouldn't they just say that in the meeting?
senior pm: politics. pride. audience
junior pm: so they'll tell me privately what they won't say publicly?
senior pm: if you ask right
junior pm: how do i ask right?
senior pm: frame it as soliciting their expertise
junior pm: "i'm new to this and want your input"?
senior pm: exactly. people love feeling like the wise advisor
junior pm: and then i just... shut up?
senior pm: shut up and write everything down
junior pm: what am i looking for?
senior pm: conflicting goals between stakeholders. who wants what and why
junior pm: ok say i do all this. what changes?
senior pm: two things
junior pm: go on
senior pm: first, you adjust your proposal based on what you learned
junior pm: makes sense
senior pm: second, you sprinkle their exact phrases into your presentation
junior pm: why?
senior pm: people support what they helped create
junior pm: even if they didn't technically create it
senior pm: especially then
junior pm: what about the difficult ones? the ones who'll disagree no matter what?
senior pm: you pre-negotiate
junior pm: how?
senior pm: in your 1:1, you say "i know you have concerns about X. i can't fully address them. can you disagree and commit in the meeting?"
junior pm: you can just ask that?
senior pm: you'd be surprised how often the answer is yes
junior pm: because you asked privately
senior pm: because you respected them enough to ask
junior pm: so the alignment meeting itself is basically...
senior pm: a ceremony
junior pm: confirming decisions already made
senior pm: in hallways. in 1:1s. in coffee chats
junior pm: the meeting before the meeting
senior pm: now you're ready to run alignment
Cat-o-sexual Lipstick Man's lawyers @TemplarsLaw have said he will sue me over this tweet if I don't pay him N140,000,000 lol.
My response is in the 4th slide.
Fun fact: Lipstick Man's attempted legal redemption arc is called "Project Ellipsis" 😄
Money truly doesn't un-lame the fundamentally lame
Three years ago, I was the smartest Christian in the room.
Or so I thought.
I'd discovered this teacher, won't name him, but if you're in the "hidden Bible knowledge" corners of X, you know the type. He had charts. Timelines. Greek word studies that made seminary professors look like Sunday school dropouts.
And he had a hook:
"What the modern church won't tell you about [insert doctrine]."
I was hooked.
It started innocently. A YouTube video. Then a book. Then a private Discord where the "serious students" gathered.
Within six months, I couldn't listen to my own pastor anymore.
His sermons felt... basic. Shallow. Like he was feeding us milk while I was feasting on meat.
I'd sit in the pew mentally correcting him. "If he only understood the original Greek here..."
I wasn't being sanctified.
I was being isolated.
And I didn't see it because I felt smarter than I'd ever felt in my Christian life.
My wife asked me a simple question:
"Has all this studying made you love Jesus more, or just made you love being right?"
I got defensive. Angry, even.
Because deep down, I knew the answer.
I could chart the seventy weeks of Daniel. I could debate the Nephilim.
But I hadn't prayed—really prayed—in months.
I'd become a theological collector instead of a disciple.
THE FIVE SYMPTOMS I MISSED (That You're Missing Too)
Looking back, the red flags were neon. If you're in the early stages of what I went through, here's what you're experiencing right now:
1. You're Chasing the "Secret"
The content you consume always promises "What they won't tell you." Hidden knowledge. Lost books.
The trap: God doesn't hide truth from the humble. He hides it from the proud. (Matthew 11:25)
2. You Need Extra Books to Prop It Up
My teacher loved the Book of Enoch. Not as historical context—as required reading.
The trap: "To the law and to the testimony: if they speak not according to this word, it is because there is no light in them." (Isaiah 8:20, KJV)
3. You Feel Superior to "Average Christians"
This was the most intoxicating part. I'd scroll through Christian X and think, "These people have no idea."
The trap: "Knowledge puffeth up, but charity edifieth." (1 Corinthians 8:1, KJV)
4. You're Poisoned Against Plain Preaching
I couldn't sit under normal teaching anymore. Expository sermons felt boring.
The trap: The gospel that saves is simple enough for a child. If you need a PhD to understand your teacher's "real" message, you're learning gnosticism.
5. It Produces Charts, Not Holiness
Here's the test I failed: I could draw you a timeline of the end times. But I couldn't tell you the last time I'd wept over my sin.
The trap: "By their fruits ye shall know them." (Matthew 7:20, KJV)
THE WAY OUT
I didn't leave because I got smarter.
I left because I got desperate.
One night, after another argument with my wife about my "studies," I broke.
I prayed the most honest prayer of my life:
"God, if I'm wrong, show me. Even if it humiliates me. I don't want to be right. I want to be Yours."
Within a week, the scales fell.
I deleted the Discord. Unsubscribed from the channels. Threw out the books.
And I went back to my church and wept through an entire sermon on the prodigal son.
If you're reading this and feeling defensive, you're where I was.
Run this test: Fail two of the symptoms above, and walk away before you lose three years like I did.
I'm not writing this from a high horse. I'm writing this from the ditch.
Here's what I came back to:
Jesus. Crucified. Risen. Coming again.
Repent. Believe. Be baptized. Make disciples.
Love God. Love neighbor. Die to self.
That's it.
No secret knowledge required. No hidden books. No elite club.
Just a bloody cross and an empty tomb.
And if that feels too simple, you're already in the trap