Ancient Alien Theorist

[Ancient Alien Theorist @ScienceAndShit]

@imonirban Lol I had Kesha on mine in the year 2024. I am nothing if not predictable and consistent.

[wint @dril]

"You may shoot me dead in the street, but in the Arena of Principled Debate I'll remain undefeated. Ha. Enjoy your delusion."—His Last Words

[Ancient Alien Theorist @ScienceAndShit]

@TulsiGabbard you are NOT a femininomenon

[Ancient Alien Theorist @ScienceAndShit]

I'm at a bar and a girl has a clear purse that only contains 3 Slim Jim's and a wad of loose dollars

[birdsrightsactivist @ProBirdRights]

“birnd where have u been???” I have been growing BIG money by investing in WEALTH big dollar $$ mindeset here is how ⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️

1. collect a hundrred sticks
2 sticks
3. Sticks
4. sticks
4. Sticks
5 stickss
6) sticks

Sticks

[𝓝𝓮𝔀𝓼 Dan Scavino Jr.🇺🇸🦅 @DanScavinoTNews]

Nancy Reagan when she sees Henry Kissinger come thru the gates to hell

[Sera Koulabdara @SeraKoulabdara]

YES

[Daryl Surat @DarylSurat]

As Twitter's general functionality continues to decline, there are times when you may find it difficult to search for the content you need. So, as a public service announcement, here is the video clip you are trying to find to post when discussing the death of Henry Kissinger now

[Klonopin Centaur @facetedcarapace]

If you put a new trash bag in the can *before* you take the trash to the dumpster, the chore is entirely done when you get back inside. Little tricks like this keep you from killing yourself in your 30's.

[Gayest Tone @gayest_tone]

That’s not true, your dad fought a war with the Vietnamese and one with a tumor, and God didn’t let him win either of them.

[Ancient Alien Theorist @ScienceAndShit]

The lights kept getting randomly brighter and dimmer. At 2 am, one of the door alarms went off and no one bothered to stop it for like 30 minutes. The mayors of Dallas and Fort Worth have alternating announcements telling us about their city and I've heard each about 75 times.

[Ancient Alien Theorist @ScienceAndShit]

My flight got delayed and I had to spend the night in DFW airport and I'm only sort of kidding when I say that the CIA should study this airport for torture techniques.

[40Nix🌺M3あ-17a @40Nix]

the secret meaning behind the X logo

[wint @dril]

"you post about girls asses while people are dying in a submarine. Really normal" i will post about Girls asses as the sun engulfs the earth

[د 𓂆 @normalarab]

when there’s a minor inconvenience

[Richard Parry @_RichardParry_]

As a self-education project during lockdown I wanted to see if I could mimic a brand’s advertising style

Anyway, I made this, happy birthday Grimace or whatever

[Daryl Surat @DarylSurat]

As Twitter's general functionality continues to decline, there are times when you may find it difficult to search for the content you need. So, as a public service announcement, here is the video clip you are trying to find to post when discussing the death of Pat Robertson today

[Ben Crew @BenjaminCrew1]

Me and my boy drunk at the Taco Bell register at 1:30 am trying to order an item that hasn't been on the menu for years

[Ancient Alien Theorist @ScienceAndShit]

Chris and I are at the local diner and they're playing Monster Mash in April. Incredible.