Southeastern Tranes

The franchise formerly known as @Se_Raleway. Still delayed and useless. THIS ACCOUNT IS A PARODY. Tweets courtesy of @technige & @tonyjwhill

[Southeastern Tranes @Se_Tranes]

Ahead of February 1st please be aware of new rules regarding communication #southeastern

[Southeastern Tranes @Se_Tranes]

Expect delays #southeastern

[Ed P @edwardgpease]

@Se_Tranes I see the works at lewisham are going well

[Southeastern Tranes @Se_Tranes]

It's not like any of you smegpots actually wanted to go to work today anyway #southeastern

[Southeastern Tranes @Se_Tranes]

NEW - No trains between Here and There until the end of time
#southeeastern

[Southeastern Tranes @Se_Tranes]

It's time to open door number 3 on the #Southeastern Advent Calendar. Ooooh, look, isn't that a festive treat:

[Patrick Grant @paddygrant]

Nurses, ambulance workers, rail workers, postal workers, teachers are not the enemies of the people. They are the people. In many cases the best of the people. This government narrative is vile.

[Southeastern Tranes @Se_Tranes]

Wouldn't it be nice if we could have snow and strikes every day? Things are so much calmer without so many of you smeg heads about... #justsaying #southeastern

[Southeastern Tranes @Se_Tranes]

Thanks, Eve. Replacement sledge services are in operation on affected routes #southeastern

[Ed P @edwardgpease]

@Se_Tranes it’s snowing.
are going to run any tranes tomorrow ?

[Southeastern Tranes @Se_Tranes]

The Ramsgate to Headcorn International service due 08:43 is experiencing slight delays due to the snow. This trane is now expected at 09:14 #southeastern

[Southeastern Tranes @Se_Tranes]

It'll still go in the bin. We don't give money away, you think these exotic biscuits are gonna pay for themselves?
#southeastern

[Ben Maslen @actionsquid]

Tip for all customers of @Se_Railway. I have had two Delay Repay claims rejected this week, both with the reason given that my Flexi ticket pass had not been activated on the Key. It had, in both cases. Always take a screenshot of the activated pass, to email to #southeastern

[Southeastern Tranes @Se_Tranes]

Believe it or not, we're not on strike. We're always this shit
#southeastern

[Southeastern Tranes @Se_Tranes]

Is now the time to talk about our next round of fare increases?
#southeastern

[Southeastern Tranes @Se_Tranes]

Pretty sure it's not written down anywhere that we *have* to run trains when it's raining.
#southeastern

[Southeastern Tranes @Se_Tranes]

Has anybody seen a British Rail Class 375 Electrostar between Maidstone East and Barming? #AskingForAFriend #southeastern

[Southeastern Tranes @Se_Tranes]

Passengers are advised that there is a small puddle at the bottom of the platform stairs at Ebbslfeet National, please try to avoid whilst we pretend to look for the mop.
#southeastern

[Southeastern Tranes @Se_Tranes]

The 11:05 service from Headcorn International to London Charing Cross has been cancelled. Replacement canal boat service is now in operation
#southeastern

[Southeastern Tranes @Se_Tranes]

The 08:45 service from Folkestone West to Dover Priory has been washed away and will now be terminating at Calais Ville
#southeastern

[Southeastern Tranes @Se_Tranes]

Both directions as in... up and down, up and down, up and down?
#southeastern

[Southern @SouthernRailUK]

⚠️ Due to a trampoline on the line between Brighton and Worthing, services are being disrupted.

This is affecting trains in both directions.

ℹ️ More to follow.

[Southeastern Tranes @Se_Tranes]

We could easily have won 'Trane Company of the Year' - we had over 100% of the votes and are the only provider with an unblemished record - but have withdrawn from the competition to allow a lesser service like @Southern_Trains an opportunity to briefly shine.
#southeastern

[Southeastern Tranes @Se_Tranes]

It's late, deal with it. Stop calling 'customer services' like we're expected to care.
#southeastern

[Southeastern Tranes @Se_Tranes]

Thanks to everyone who joined us on WhatsApp for our virtual "Meet the Manager" session this morning.

A few less dick pics than we're used to and only 98% of the messages questioned the status of management's intelligence so a win overall! #southeastern