Tiny Shaq

Shaq, but small.

[mike ginn @shutupmikeginn]

Am I original?
Yeah
Am I the only one?
Yeah
Am I sexual?
Yeah
Is my neediness straining our relationship?
Yeah
Backstreets back, alright!

[mike ginn @shutupmikeginn]

(Tim Burton walks into a flooring store)
Salesman: hello, welcome to—
(Tims already speedwalking away towards the checkered tile section)

[♥mark magark♥ @markedly]

ME (externally): talks to my Uber driver for a minute
ME (internally): wow this is a really big step for me

[nani @pettyblackgirI]

-"Is it because I'm ugly?"
-"Yeah, it is"
honestly, this video had me screaming.

[St Peter @stpeteyontweety]

Little known fact :
The Loch Ness Monster was present for the birth of Jesus

[Ben Rosen @Rosen]

HISTORY OF US PRESIDENTS:

👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👴🏼👨🏾👹

[Sage Boggs @sageboggs]

All of these map colors are confusing but one thing is for sure: Clinton is winning the ocean

[drewtoothpaste.bsky.social @drewtoothpaste]

You've had a bad day, America. Maybe this will cheer you up

[Geeted Rivalry @ElSangito]

ok what do we do to get young progressive millennial socialists into local office and state politics

who aren't mostly straight white guys

[david @_elvishpresley_]

It's your cousin, Marvin Berry! You know that new sound you're looking for? Listen to this!
*belches alphabet*
Marvin quit calling me

[Andrew Nadeau @TheAndrewNadeau]

If you read the entire dictionary technically you've read every book but out of order.

[Tiny Shaq @SenorManagement]

We're here on Earth to connect with a fateful few and if I can't be one of yours you won't be one of mine.

[Jeremy McLellan @JeremyMcLellan]

Hillary has demonstrated, for the first time in presidential history, the female mastery of how to get an alpha male to destroy himself.

[Pelsjas @elsaPelsjas]

life: