ShapsTriggered

I play games like a 4Head

[MiaAyana 🦋 Recovering @DarlingMiaAyana]

Well... I finally have an answer.

I was officially diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder (Level 1), and because I also have ADHD, that means I'm AuDHD. 🦋

Honestly? I'm still processing it.
Part of me feels relieved. For the first time in a long time, so many pieces of my life suddenly make sense. The way I learn. The way I communicate. Why certain things that seem "easy" for others can completely overwhelm me. Why I've always felt like I had to work twice as hard just to keep up or fit in. Being extremely exhausted, not liking changes, needing routine, needing space and getting overwhelmed.

Another part of me is grieving a little.

Not because I'm autistic. I have always been autistic. I just didn't know it officially but felt like something was different. I'm grieving the years I spent wondering what was "wrong" with me, blaming myself for struggling, and trying so hard to be someone everyone else seemed to be naturally.

I've learned that I'm very high masking. For a long time, masking helped me survive. It helped me blend in, meet expectations, and appear like I was doing okay. But masking also meant that a lot of people, including myself, didn't always see how much energy it took just to get through everyday life.
I think one of my biggest fears moving forward is that because I seem "high functioning," people will continue to minimize my struggles. High masking doesn't mean life is easy. It doesn't mean I don't become overwhelmed, exhausted, or need support. It just means I've gotten very good at hiding it.
The diagnosis doesn't change who I am. I'm still me. It just gives me language for experiences I've had my entire life.

I'm incredibly grateful that I've already been given some resources and tools to start learning more about myself. I'm hoping to find someone nearby who specializes in working with autistic adults because I know this is just the beginning of understanding myself better.

If anything, this diagnosis has given me something I haven't had in a long time which is compassion for myself.

So here's to learning. Here's to unmasking, little by little. Here's to giving myself grace instead of guilt.
And if you're someone who's ever felt "different," misunderstood, or like you've spent your whole life trying to figure yourself out... you're not alone. 🌻

[ShapsTriggered @ShapsTriggered]

Since I lost my chance to buy the Goblinstorm deck and I definitely won't be buying it 3rd party I decided instead to just buy @wizardofbarge merchandise directly from their shop. Been wanting more goblin art since I first saw Gobblin and Squablin, sad today was like this.

[ShapsTriggered @ShapsTriggered]

@wizards_magic @MTGSecretLair Glad we moved away from print to demand to a system that rewards scalpers and botters.

[ShapsTriggered @ShapsTriggered]

Saved up for months since the @wizardofbarge Krenko art was leaked, got up early and waited in queue for Goblinstorm. Sold out in 34 minutes, but I continued to wait in queue thinking maybe it reserved a spot. Nope, removed from cart and kicked me off the site. 1/2

[ShapsTriggered @ShapsTriggered]

Real fun though seeing official WPN stores scalping the product on resell sites though for a %600 mark up lmfao.

[ShapsTriggered @ShapsTriggered]

Can't have a shit day myself.

[Kruz @Kruzadar]

Time to face the music guys. It's your priorities and personality. Until you realize that and stop lying to yourselves about what a REAL man is, you'll forever be miserable and alone. YOU are cockblocking yourself from having a good life because of a false sense of masculinity.

[Kruz @Kruzadar]

REAL men don't SA their female friends or take advantage of them when they're drunk.

REAL men don't pretend to be a woman's friend just to try to fuck her.

REAL men don't only see women as fuckable objects.

REAL men don't pressure women into sex.

[Kruz @Kruzadar]

Incels and mofos who red pill shit and only surround themselves with hoes are not real men. Stop being delusional. Wake up. Those men are not happy: they are insufferable and only care about sex. None of them have wives or family. Their lives are not fulfilling. They're pathetic.

[Kruz @Kruzadar]

Mike was never the main character's friend. He pretended to be. He's NOT shy. It's a fake "shy" act that mofos like whatshisnutsSykunno does. Quit lying to yourselves. Mike is a manipulative coward.

Quit taking advice from men who're single or only surround themselves w/ hoes.

[Kruz @Kruzadar]

The amount of MEN defending r/niceguy Mike on my Fears to Fathom Woodbury Getaway video is DISGUSTING.

Y'all wonder why you're single or women don't wanna talk to you. You're literally defending a dude who not only SA the main character, but has ulterior motives the ENTIRE time.

[MiaAyana 🦋 Recovering @DarlingMiaAyana]

Come by and support my wife @KairuichanVT at her booth if you’re at Weebcon! We will be at the vendor booth 430 and selling blankets, prints, keychains!

Yes, I crawled out of my gremlin hole to come out in public and support the best wife.

[ShapsTriggered @ShapsTriggered]

Feelin a lot, no place to put it all. Wish things were different.

[ShapsTriggered @ShapsTriggered]

Hard swallowing so much frustration.

[ShapsTriggered @ShapsTriggered]

@DarlingMiaAyana @OWCavalry Yea, I thought about showing you. It only gets worse the more you look.

[Novelle art. @artistryhere]

.

[໊ @user0000O0]

what is it called when you were overthinking and it turns out you were right

[⋆｡𖦹 ° @rjmxrell]

overthinking can kill you inside

[S @nlvvc_]

no meds no therapy no psych ward just raw dogging this mental illness the way god intended