Shitmy Turk

Because I have a Turkish friend that says funny and interesting things and i want to share them all with you

[Shitmy Turk @ShitMyTurkSays]

Man, STOP signs are for gay people

[Shitmy Turk @ShitMyTurkSays]

I heard you can't have sex in the pool, is that true?

[Shitmy Turk @ShitMyTurkSays]

you don't pay a prostitute for sex, you pay her to leave after sex. #LifeLessons

[Shitmy Turk @ShitMyTurkSays]

*what have you done for God lately?* Turk replies " I make the ladies call his name"

[Shitmy Turk @ShitMyTurkSays]

Dear @alanmuhealden... http://t.co/htQ6DIw9

[Shitmy Turk @ShitMyTurkSays]

Saad, you look ugly man, why are you wet?

[Shitmy Turk @ShitMyTurkSays]

there was a band, what was it called, 5 cent? (referring to 50Cent the rapper)

[Shitmy Turk @ShitMyTurkSays]

in high school i was bigger, i had bigger tits (grabs his chest)

[Shitmy Turk @ShitMyTurkSays]

every time she speaks i feel like she a ....hhhhhh whore

[Shitmy Turk @ShitMyTurkSays]

after walking in with new haircut, "man.. I look like German porn star! this lady(his barber) is crazy!" #FAIL #NaziHairDo

[Shitmy Turk @ShitMyTurkSays]

you can touch, but not too much

[Shitmy Turk @ShitMyTurkSays]

I don't speak English. I pretend.

[Shitmy Turk @ShitMyTurkSays]

"OMG, my heart is beating again!"

[Shitmy Turk @ShitMyTurkSays]

"You don't drink? You're going to go to hell"

[Shitmy Turk @ShitMyTurkSays]

"I am not Turkish, i don't know what I am, I was abducted by aliens"

[Shitmy Turk @ShitMyTurkSays]

I wanted to wear a mini skirt and high heels today, I am a slutty guy #Halloween

[Shitmy Turk @ShitMyTurkSays]

what is #Time magazine? I don't know this...

[Shitmy Turk @ShitMyTurkSays]

(while trying a twizzler for the first time) "what is the purpose of this?"

[Shitmy Turk @ShitMyTurkSays]

it is only cheating if you sleep with someone else more than once #Relationships #Infidelity

[Shitmy Turk @ShitMyTurkSays]

I want to get married, just so I can get divorced #Marriage #Love