TheRealSlimSmedley

Insect ligament, I'm the bees knees.

[TheRealSlimSmedley @Smeduz]

Can anyone remember the energy drink ‘pussy’ or was that just a fever dream?

[TheRealSlimSmedley @Smeduz]

Quote of the day today comes from the Foreman ‘You can’t keep putting marks on dodgy stuff mate else we will all be walking round with make-up on’

[TheRealSlimSmedley @Smeduz]

Do I buy a Mx-5 mk1 and start the midlife crisis early?

[Susie Dent @susie_dent]

I wish I had the words to describe the exceptional man that was Sean Lock. But today I don’t, and I think he might have liked it that way.

[TheRealSlimSmedley @Smeduz]

@DanielKnight94 Looks a little mossy to me

[TheRealSlimSmedley @Smeduz]

@j0estaples What till someone mentions something while you do a shift a Matalan at you start to cry 😂

[TheRealSlimSmedley @Smeduz]

Who the fuck puts a flush sensor on a toilet right behind where you sit. Forget Poseidon’s kiss, that was more Poseidon’s snog with unsolicited tongue.

[TheRealSlimSmedley @Smeduz]

I wonder if the MLM ‘look how much commission I’ve made on the first day’ people are declaring their income to HMRC? 🤔

[TheRealSlimSmedley @Smeduz]

Kinder bueno white is so much better than the normal one.

[TheRealSlimSmedley @Smeduz]

@j0estaples It’s worse when you have a dream about a pet that’s died and you expect them to be there when you wake up 😂😭

[Soccer Aid @socceraid]

#SoccerAid would be the greatest weekend of your liiiiiife 😂😂

[TheRealSlimSmedley @Smeduz]

@FiveGuysUK get back to my van, take first bite if my bacon cheeseburger. No bacon! 😭Gutted.

[TheRealSlimSmedley @Smeduz]

Got to get up at 5am and I’m just laying here thinking, what’s the point of even trying to get to sleep at this point?

[TheRealSlimSmedley @Smeduz]

@_MightyO_ It’s brutal. I was first at the start of lap 3, where did I finish? Last

[David Pugh @davidsoho1]

Got sad news today. After 7 years of medical training, my good friend has been struck off after 1 minor indiscretion. He slept with 1 of his patients & now can no longer work in the job he loves. What a waste of time, training & money. A genuinely nice guy, and a brilliant vet..

[TheRealSlimSmedley @Smeduz]

Love it when people make a face when you follow them overtaking someone then continue to overtake them. Sorry hun you don’t go quick enough.

[TheRealSlimSmedley @Smeduz]

The vans got a crack in the windshield that Johnny Sins and Gavin from AutoGlass combined couldn’t fill

[TheRealSlimSmedley @Smeduz]

Cheese consumption is very high at the moment. Not sure if becoming addicted 😬

[TheRealSlimSmedley @Smeduz]

@jordan_bryant7 @bethan247 The normal routine then? 😉😂

[TheRealSlimSmedley @Smeduz]

@bethan247 @Cosmina_Kasma That’s brilliant!