Hey guys, it’s chapped lips season. Quick reminder that girls like manly men, so remember to not use chapstick. If your lips are dry, just keep licking those bad boys. A large, painful, inflamed red ring around your lips is one of the best ways to instantly boost your sex appeal
My mechanic is having his leg amputated because his hoist broke yesterday& he got crushed. Crazy how fast ur life can change. One day you’re doing great, and the next, ur weekend plans are shot because your stupid mechanic had to cancel the appointment to replace your alternator
PSA to all these scary costume people lurking outside, I will do anything that the movies don't do. I will run your ass over, I will pull the trigger, and I will fight your ass to the death!