Roy Harper

At your absolute best, you still won't be good enough for the wrong person.

(21+ writer)

[Roy Harper @SpeedingArrows]

𝙶𝚎𝚝 𝚊 𝚕𝚘𝚊𝚍 𝚘𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚖𝚘𝚗𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛, 𝚑𝚎 𝚍𝚘𝚎𝚜𝚗'𝚝 𝚔𝚗𝚘𝚠 𝚑𝚘𝚠 𝚝𝚘 𝚌𝚘𝚖𝚖𝚞𝚗𝚒𝚌𝚊𝚝𝚎.

𝙷𝚒𝚜 𝚖𝚒𝚗𝚍 𝚒𝚜 𝚒𝚗 𝚊 𝚍𝚒𝚏𝚏𝚎𝚛𝚎𝚗𝚝 𝚙𝚕𝚊𝚌𝚎, 𝚌𝚊𝚗 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛𝚢𝚋𝚘𝚍𝚢 𝚙𝚕𝚎𝚊𝚜𝚎 𝚐𝚒𝚟𝚎 𝚑𝚒𝚖 𝚊 𝚕𝚒𝚝𝚝𝚕𝚎 𝚋𝚒𝚝 𝚘𝚏 𝚜𝚙𝚊𝚌𝚎.

[Roy Harper @SpeedingArrows]

// I made a TF2 account, and I've been being silly and goofy over there.

My bad, it /will/ happen again 😔

[Roy Harper @SpeedingArrows]

// Music randomly started playing at work and it wasn't the usual one from the claw machine.

Demons, JIM

[Roy Harper @SpeedingArrows]

// Yeah :)

[Wally West @DeadTiredSpeed]

// WAS IT AT LEAST GOOD??

[Roy Harper @SpeedingArrows]

// I WAS DOING FINE UNTIL I ACCIDENTALLY DROPPED MY CHIMICHANGA

[Wally West @DeadTiredSpeed]

// AGAIN??

Someone please keep this man away from the oil 😭

[Roy Harper @SpeedingArrows]

// It has been zero days since I burned myself with oil 😔

[Roy Harper @SpeedingArrows]

// Who the fuck let me have money?

[Roy Harper @SpeedingArrows]

"Come on now, that would ruin the surprise."

[𝑺𝑜𝑛 𝑶𝑓 𝑳̶𝑎̶𝑧̶𝑎̶𝑟̶𝑢̶𝑠̶ @FvllenBird]

“What exactly is it that you plan on doing?”

[Roy Harper @SpeedingArrows]

"Damn, can't have fun on the job??"

[Will Harper @ClipboardDad]

"We're /working/."

[Roy Harper @SpeedingArrows]

"It's too late for it /not/ to be one."

[𝑺𝑜𝑛 𝑶𝑓 𝑳̶𝑎̶𝑧̶𝑎̶𝑟̶𝑢̶𝑠̶ @FvllenBird]

“I didn’t mean that as an invita- nevermind.”

[Roy Harper @SpeedingArrows]

"Give me a few minutes, and I can change that-"

[𝑺𝑜𝑛 𝑶𝑓 𝑳̶𝑎̶𝑧̶𝑎̶𝑟̶𝑢̶𝑠̶ @FvllenBird]

“Well, things have gotten quiet and boring.”

[Roy Harper @SpeedingArrows]

"You're no fun."

[Will Harper @ClipboardDad]

"I /really/ need Roy to stop yelling 'Get down Mr. President' while on the job."

[Roy Harper @SpeedingArrows]

"Kids that don't know what pokemon is.

Fortunately, she is not one of said kids."

[Jason Todd @OutragedOutlaw]

"Of course. What kid doesn't like pokemon? Especially pokemon with added Uber violence!"

[Roy Harper @SpeedingArrows]

"Damn......she's gonna love those, thanks."

[Jason Todd @OutragedOutlaw]

"A complete collection of the Pokémon Adventures Manga in both Japanese and English"

[Roy Harper @SpeedingArrows]

"Doesn't change the fact it was still more than ya should have."

A pause, green eyes shifting over to the other.

"Oh? Whatcha get her?"

[Jason Todd @OutragedOutlaw]

"Now you know for a fact I didn't use my own money to get that made. I DID however use my own money to get something for lian."

[Roy Harper @SpeedingArrows]

// Course

/None/ of us are normal

[Harv/ey Dent @TwoHalvesOfDent]

// Thank you for understanding that I am /not/ normal about this man-

[Roy Harper @SpeedingArrows]

He stays quiet for a while, turning the Tanto around in his hand as he examines it.

"Jeez Jaybird, ya didn't need to spend /that/ much on me-"

[Jason Todd @OutragedOutlaw]

"Cost me $150 grand to have that Tanto made by a bona fide master blacksmith over in Osaka. Happy birthday, doofus"

[Roy Harper @SpeedingArrows]

// That is a very valid thing to get distracted by, honestly.

[Harv/ey Dent @TwoHalvesOfDent]

// I need to finish writing the thing for Wood

I got distracted, clearly

[Roy Harper @SpeedingArrows]

Hands move to catch the bag before happily opening it, a smile coming onto his face.

"Thanks."

[Jason Todd @OutragedOutlaw]

"Thats what I thought."

He'd grab a bag out of the closet, and tossing it over Roy's way, pulling out a couple root beers and popping them open.

"Go head, see whatcha got"

[Roy Harper @SpeedingArrows]

// My son keeps trying to eat tinsel, so I am selling him for a nickle.

[Roy Harper @SpeedingArrows]

Several blinks. Now he kind of feels bad for being so dramatic.

"Wait, no, I was just kidding -

Besides, /not/ giving it to me will /definitely/ make you one -"

[Jason Todd @OutragedOutlaw]

-not sure if I should give it to you, since I'm SUCH an asshole."

He's joking, of course.