Spider McGee

Genius, madman, genius madman. A lazy and justifiably unsung writer who never finishes anything. Yet, in his mind, he's important. Too bad no one gets in there.

[Spider McGee @SpiderMcGee]

@GaryandShannon Skype is bad. The day Microsoft bought it was the last time it worked.

[Spider McGee @SpiderMcGee]

@GaryandShannon Bill Cosby was inspired by an episode of Lights Out? You don't say.

[Spider McGee @SpiderMcGee]

@GaryandShannon Trump is tired of being President and wants to be removed from office. But he'll never quit.

[Spider McGee @smiteboy]

To celebrate the release of A FINGER IN EVERY PIE, get the first Nick Dixon novella MONKEY JUSTICE *FREE* til 7/29. https://t.co/eI3tIGp1F6

[Spider McGee @smiteboy]

Nick Dixon is back in "A Finger in Every Pie", the pulp parody/satire 2 years in the making. $2.99 on Amazon Kindle https://t.co/5utjmMnfUs

[Spider McGee @SpiderMcGee]

@ConwayShow Time for Tarantino to go back and cut Kathy Griffin's five-second scene out of Pulp Fiction, am I right?

[Spider McGee @SpiderMcGee]

@billhandelshow Right now, Phil Hendrie is wondering why he gave up broadcast radio.

[Spider McGee @SpiderMcGee]

@GaryandShannon If Brian Williams, Pat O'Brien, Don Imus and Marv Albert can come back, Billy Bush can come back. In America, we forgive.

[Spider McGee @SpiderMcGee]

@ConwayShow It's the Talking Heads song "Psycho Killer".

[Spider McGee @SpiderMcGee]

I've met Mr. Peanut. Not impressed.

[Spider McGee @SpiderMcGee]

@BrianRathbone Pick up the beat, and then turn the beat around.

[Spider McGee @SpiderMcGee]

I admit to an identity crisis lately. But I haven't given up writing. Things are headed a weird new direction, though. You don't wanna know.

[Roscoe Gunne @RoscoeGunne]

Sent an Instagram today. And by "Instagram", I mean i broke into a girl's apartment and hid in her closet until she got naked.

[Roscoe Gunne @RoscoeGunne]

Had lunch with Philip Marlowe and Sam Spade today. I don't wanna cast no aspersions, but those guys have to squat to pee. Real gay.

[Roscoe Gunne @RoscoeGunne]

Sometimes I gotta stop blondes on the street and frisk 'em. I get no joy out of it. Just doing my job. YOU'RE WELCOME.

[Spider McGee @SpiderMcGee]

@BrianRathbone Merciless, he gives you no quarter.

[Spider McGee @SpiderMcGee]

There wasn't really a Count Chocula. This was just something our parents said to make us behave. I know this, now.

[Roscoe Gunne @RoscoeGunne]

Men wear hats. We live in a society. I better not see you without one. If you're naked and fleeing a house fire, you better have a hat on.

[Spider McGee @SpiderMcGee]

@GaryandShannon One of their kids didn't show up for the flight? Was this the Home Alone family?