Michael Squints Palledorous

Insert some deep profound and inspirational statement so everyone knows I'm trying to be deep and inspirational.

[Michael Squints Palledorous @Squintz1993]

I saw a video of @KDTrey5 saying phx fans wanted him gone. That’s the lamest thing I’ve heard! 1000% want KD to stay. REAL fans know it should be Beal that needs to go! @Mishbia15 and @Suns y’all need to do better!

[Michael Squints Palledorous @Squintz1993]

Why is it I can fall asleep for hours on the couch but the minute I lay in bed, I’m up for hours?! BTW it’s 2:45am 🙄

[Michael Squints Palledorous @Squintz1993]

Dr. Office: You need to arrive 15 minutes before your appointment.
Me: Arriving 20 minutes before and now waiting 15 minutes past my appointment to be seen!

[Michael Squints Palledorous @Squintz1993]

@syckphreek @MLB 💯% auto tune.

[Michael Squints Palledorous @Squintz1993]

Bruh! That National Anthem at the @mlb #HomeRunDerby was a trip!

[Michael Squints Palledorous @Squintz1993]

People who eat @raisingcanes probably but ketchup on their steak! @slimchickens > @raisingcanes I said what said!

[Michael Squints Palledorous @Squintz1993]

@eentertainment please add Fast Five to your lineup! My wife is losing her mind ya’ll been skipping 5 with your @TheFastSaga marathon this week! Please help!

[Michael Squints Palledorous @Squintz1993]

Slims>Canes #fightme @slimchickens

[Michael Squints Palledorous @Squintz1993]

Watching the @Suns and @warriors and all I have to say is @Money23Green you a B***h!

[Michael Squints Palledorous @Squintz1993]

@qdoba brisket taco! C’mon @qdoba do better! This is the weakest taco ever!

[Michael Squints Palledorous @Squintz1993]

It’s the terrible edit that makes it hilarious. My wife wanted a pic her crush @kikehndez this was the best I could do! 🤣@DodgersNation @Dodgers #dodgers #baseball #crush

[Michael Squints Palledorous @Squintz1993]

@fuddruckers you suck! Sincerely, Colorado!

But seriously, Saskatchewan!!! C’mon man!

[Michael Squints Palledorous @Squintz1993]

@Xfinity @XfinitySupport Yes! Again, since 3:30pm and I work from home.

[Michael Squints Palledorous @Squintz1993]

@Xfinity do better! Your service is straight trash!!! This is now the 6th in in the last hour.

[Book @DevinBook]

Can all y’all get out my city
I like it better quiet

[Michael Squints Palledorous @Squintz1993]

#patrickbeverly is the epitome of sh*ty player! He’s a terrible person and a disgrace to humanity! Like Mark Wahlberg said in Ted… “I really hope you f**king get Lou Gehrig disease ”

[Michael Squints Palledorous @Squintz1993]

@RedSox Alex Verdugo Doesn’t matter if you win by an inch or a mile, Winning’s winning! Everyone had the same opportunity to sprint. It’s not the @Dodgers fault everyone else jogged instead of sprinting! You mad because you’re not in the playoffs! CTFO!

[Michael Squints Palledorous @Squintz1993]

@FrankiesTwoLoud Doesn’t matter if you win by an inch or a mile, Winning’s winning! Everyone had the same opportunity to sprint. It’s not the Los Angeles Dodgers fault everyone else jogged instead of sprinting!

[Michael Squints Palledorous @Squintz1993]

@Pads1818 Doesn’t matter if you win by an inch or a mile, Winning’s winning! Everyone had the same opportunity to sprint. It’s not the Los Angeles Dodgers fault everyone else jogged instead of sprinting!

[Michael Squints Palledorous @Squintz1993]

#MLBAllSTAR2022