Steve Lattimer LB

football, family, Funyons, in that order RETWEETER

[Steve Lattimer LB @SteveLattimer]

Yes, that’s a waffle maker. Yes, I know this is a gym. No, you cannot have a homemade waffle.

[𝑴𝒐 𝑴𝒐𝒉𝒍𝒆𝒓 @MoMohler]

This is why I only allow my children 1 small cup of water a day so we can run more data centers.

[Darla @ddsmidt]

Nothing convinces me I’d be a great race car driver more than driving on a busy interstate.

[pink slime princess @bettyjaws]

microdosing farts by pooping

[Lady Gooch @_ladygooch]

We double nut at dawn

[blaire @pissshit90001]

If you’re lactose intolerant I’m So Fucking Sorry

[𝑴𝒐 𝑴𝒐𝒉𝒍𝒆𝒓 @MoMohler]

Chipotle’s CEO seeing Taco Bell pull ahead in the explosive diarrhea contest…

[pink slime princess @bettyjaws]

ur literally on dude im leaving

[𝑴𝒐 𝑴𝒐𝒉𝒍𝒆𝒓 @MoMohler]

Big deal, in the U.S. we can do that at any Cracker Barrel.

[nelly! @nellychillin]

“Cinephile” you be fucking the movies dawg?

[iraq obama @ducktelevision]

"add me on snapchat" i am thirty fucking two.. i will add you to my fucking rolodex, sport

[•ultra glitch• @highsieze6]

id like to see you stare into my spinning 3D ring and say that shit

[cher @mclIark]

esex in the group chat call that unconsensual cucking

[penny @xXMeatGodXx]

if i was a horse i would love licking that salt block

[Brunette Bohemian @Jane_Doe82]

The absolute vitriol I feel if I sneeze in a room full of people and no one says “bless you”

[clay ⛷️ @hanfjob]

Eating a big bowl of cereal

[TRAUMARESPONSE @TRAUMA_RESP0NSE]

I don't wanna be anywhere, Twitter ain't special.

[Slappy @Slapmemam]

Cats sense fear. I sense cats. We’ve reached a professional standoff.

[Mostly Harmless Research Monkey @dangitdale66]

In our zeal to avoid explosive diarrhea, we forgot to be mindful of bowel obstructions.

[Nayele18 @nayele18maybe]

Almost time to worry about shit while lying down

[moderately amusing gay wolf @ModeratelyMused]

45 minutes of silent phone scrolling i randomly announced “im an asshole” and my best friend says “you don’t know that”