Steven Dye

I tell jokes. Sometimes they're funny. Mostly they're not.

[Steven Dye @StevenMDye]

10:45, no work tomorrow, and he's tipping back the sweetened iced tea! #NightOutWithTony @tony791999

[Steven Dye @StevenMDye]

A dude with frizzy white hair just rolled by in a Delorean. Where am I?

[Steven Dye @StevenMDye]

Um... so, totally not lame. Actually, pretty awesome. #fast5

[Steven Dye @StevenMDye]

@Jasmine_Marie89 So true... can't say its worth it though.

[Steven Dye @StevenMDye]

@Jasmine_Marie89 Wait... I'm not in Jr High. Um... OK I'm at a loss. I'm driving. The girl in the Prius next to me is picking her nose.

[Steven Dye @StevenMDye]

@Jasmine_Marie89 "something funny"

[Steven Dye @StevenMDye]

Would it be funny if I died my hair orange right now? #insensitivity

[Steven Dye @StevenMDye]

Hey girl- those Victoria's Secret "Pink" yoga pants in no way make your child-sized beanbag ass look good. Its like a lumpy, cotton pillow.

[Steven Dye @StevenMDye]

@JustinPWNSyou nice one. Clever

[Steven Dye @StevenMDye]

Right now, my favorite songs are: Payphone, Lights (Ellie Goulding), Primadonna Girl, and Call Me Maybe. I swear Im straight- FM Radio sucks

[Steven Dye @StevenMDye]

Dear followers: I apologize. I know that my tweets were SO interesting, witty, funny, and memorable- I apologize. But... I'M BACK BITCHES!

[Steven Dye @StevenMDye]

Just seriously considered getting a mini fridge in my STUDIO next to my bed, so I dont have to get up for beer. #laziness

[Steven Dye @StevenMDye]

Well twitter... I'm back. Took a break- you were smothering me. Not sure what to say, I know it's been a while. Did you miss me?

[Steven Dye @StevenMDye]

Chris from the @nerdist should be on @redbarradio with Mike D when he's in Chicago, or vise versa!

[Steven Dye @StevenMDye]

@NLO Perfect. Hope everything gets better for you! Long live NLO.

[Steven Dye @StevenMDye]

@pmelt the new NLO show on the feed is just a copy of the last 1 with @JoshDenny . I'm sure you know by now... Where can I find the right 1?

[Steven Dye @StevenMDye]

Well I abandoned that idea very quickly. Maybe I'm starting to be over twitter..

[Steven Dye @StevenMDye]

Michael J Fox needs to come out with a bobble head doll. (yes, recycled from my Facebook... I'm starting off slow. Relax.) #JokeAnHour

[Steven Dye @StevenMDye]

Hey followers! I forgot about twitter for the last month... To make up for it, today: a joke every hour till midnight. Starting at 10.

[Steven Dye @StevenMDye]

It was awesome meeting @brido @dwangelo and of course Mike D at the @redbarradio LA show! So great that @pizzanachos69 came too! (sarcasm)