Barbs

[matt bernstein @mattxiv]

just got off the phone with my close personal friend mitch mcconnell. we spoke for six hours. he told me he is GAY and might be interested in exploring POLYAMORY. i look forward to him returning to work as soon as possible.

[machine yearning engineer @confusionm8trix]

I would probably call people more often if they wouldn’t get a missed call notification. I love to call and I love to be called randomly but I hate knowing that a return call will be coming for me at an unknown time. I recognize this is something deeply wrong with me

[user @user84829272]

Not one crying American kid in the stands we really dgaf

[Adam London @_adamlondon]

no one:

haaland on snapchat after a historic performance on the world’s biggest stage:

[Troll Football @TrollFootball]

How USA will play against Belgium now that they have Donald Trump's presidential red card immunity

[W.E.B. DaBoi @Tyre_94]

Don’t wanna drink on a Monday but my country needs me

[Juez Central @Juezcentral]

Al jugar en la selección, Erling Haaland le hizo una petición especial a la Federación: que incluyeran el apellido "Braut" en su camiseta. Por eso es Braut Haaland.

Braut el apellido de su madre Marita, que fue atleta profesional, múltiple campeona de heptatlón en Noruega.

Erling siempre ha dicho que su amor por el fútbol vino por su padre ex futbolista, pero que su disciplina y estado físico vino de su madre Marita. Mezcla perfecta para crear un monstruo del fútbol.

Homenaje a mamá🫶

[David Z. Morris @davidzmorris]

Mitch McConnell remaining technically alive for an extra three weeks because of a manipulative procedural maneuver is exactly how he would have wanted to go out.

[Hank Green @hankgreen]

My feelings on the incentives of AI businesses building coding tools: 🤷🏼‍♂️

My feelings on the incentives of AI businesses building companionship:

[goma @soigomaa]

It all comes down to the absolute refusal to study the female body, test products and medications on females, and give women medical care instead of diagnosing everything as "anxiety" and throwing chemical castration at it.

[ALUTHEDON @Mbakaza4L]

MAKE POLITICIANS YOUNG AGAIN

[gianmarco @GianmarcoSoresi]

How could they tell

[Gentleman Doofus @GentleDoofus]

Come on secret American birth certificate…

[A Jennie of Jennie and Jennie 🏳️‍⚧️💾🔞 @gncgalactus]

The act itself does not move me, but In a world of 8 billion finding the other person who is the same sort of insane to do with with you is terribly romantic

[trash jones @jzux]

congress: americans do not deserve healthcare

also congress: sorry that was just my 4-month paid depression vacation

[Max @welp_max]

he’s dead ass modern day Diana

[evan loves worf @esjesjesj]

“We’re doing 19 watergates a day” is not a good thing