grant

former intellectual. extremely normal guy. hot topic rewards member. comic.

[grant @TakeForGrantd]

getting arrested by the Air Marshall for forcing my way into the cockpit and asking him to honk the horn

[CORRELL B @CORRELLB2]

THE NATIONAL ANTHEM (COVER)

[grant @TakeForGrantd]

rooting for the Bengals purely because Joe Burrow was in my 2nd grade class and came to my birthday party at the bowling alley

[grant @TakeForGrantd]

my life goal is to buy LinkedIn and make it a haven for tumblr porn gifs

[grant @TakeForGrantd]

pussy so good it got me utilizing the word utilizing

[grant @TakeForGrantd]

pussy so good it got me utilizing early 2000’s emojis like :3 and :D over text

[CORRELL B @CORRELLB2]

BLINK 182 - I MISS YOU (COVER)

[grant @TakeForGrantd]

@DJSlizzard you were the Gym Leader that day

[grant @TakeForGrantd]

the Citizen App is so hilarious man it’s like Pokémon Go except for vigilantes

[grant @TakeForGrantd]

about to partake in my favorite pastime; getting 14 beers deep and chopping a lot of vegetables as fast as humanly possible

[grant @TakeForGrantd]

Never understood the 5G conspiracies until I drove through Kansas and only had 2G data. They thought we skipped 3 whole G’s man I’d be calling bullshit too

[grant @TakeForGrantd]

Writing-off the 300,000 ice cold beers I drank this year as a business expense

[grant @TakeForGrantd]

just got kicked out of a Wisconsin bar for playing Barbie Girl 13 times in a row on the jukebox. Free speech is under attack in america

[grant @TakeForGrantd]

driving through the countryside listening to Sturgill Simpson I’m so bricked up rn

[grant @TakeForGrantd]

@MildThaang That would be about 10 what’s new pussycats

[grant @TakeForGrantd]

Being a domestic terrorist on TouchTunes right now

[grant @TakeForGrantd]

my gf keeps joking about pegging me which normally would be funny if I wasn’t completely broke with both her birthday and Christmas coming up back to back

[grant @TakeForGrantd]

Been stuck in small-town Nebraska for 3 days bc of a blizzard, but that’s ok because I’m at a bar called Little Jerry’s right now and this drunk guy keeps demanding to talk to Little Jerry

[grant @TakeForGrantd]

Instagram can have as much of my data as they want as long as they keep marketing shirts like this to me

[grant @TakeForGrantd]

shouting “Freebird” at the church choir in the middle of Sunday mass