Tyler Olsen

Trying to understand Healthcare | Go @Cubs

[Josh Centers @jcenters]

I’m gonna propose the Shut Up, Nerds Act:

* Indoor smoking is legal again
* Smoking and drinking age is 16
* Open containers legal again as long as your BAC is under a generous legal limit
* As many people as you want in your car, because this is America

I predict the birth rate will double in ten years.

[Mike Bird @Birdyword]

Sometimes I think about the people who trekked across America on the understanding that God had promised them something amazing, thousands of miles through some pretty inhospitable and dangerous places, and then got to coastal California and got to be like wow yeah, knew it

[⭕ Brock Pierson @brockpierson]

How come everyone forces introverts to leave their comfort zone for a while but no one forces extroverts to shut the fuck up for a while

[El CondeNado @elconde_nad0]

🐂: Señor ¿Está usted jugando?
👨‍🦳: No, pero ellos de allí sí.
🐂: Perfecto, gracias

[Jamie Kennedy @jamierkennedy]

Amazingly the barman in the clubhouse was taking a timelapse of the sunset.

And captured the moment I found the ball in the hole!

Thanks Chris.

[D J @TxForever]

My 56 degree right after piping my drive right down the middle of the fairway

[Trent @BarstoolTrent]

Gotta be tough when you’re a goalie after a mistake like that and the action is on the other end and you’re just standing there like man they’re probably frying me on the internet

[Freddy Doubles @freddydoubles]

If I’m playing with a random, he could tell me he eagled every hole on the golf course and I would just be like “nice man good playing”

[Kay Adams @heykayadams]

Zero Gravity in Naperville Illinois

[Masters Burner @ANGC_burner]

On this 250th Independence Day, let us remember that an immigrant from Uganda is absolutely GHINmogging the President of the United States #america

[Cimmerian Pervert @cimmerian_v]

Balls that survive 18 holes get retired to the putting mat. I call it Ballhalla.

[big content guy @bigcontentguy]

big week for boobs

[Jackson @macrojack21]

in hindsight not buying a house at 2.5% rate before $6 TRILLION of new $$$ fully settled into the economy was a permanent underclass move by me

[shelby @thetrueshelby]

So the Great American State Fair lasted approximately 17 minutes before a guy got caught masturbating in public.

America 250. 🇺🇸

[Colossus Capital🗽 @colossus_cap]

Coolest part about being a Millennial is you can make a top 1-5% income and go buy a home in a modest neighborhood then realize the previous owner was a retired electrician who bought it 15 years ago for a jar of peanuts

[𝓐⭑ @ayogiovanna]

The dream ADHD career: Being the idea person who comes up with creative concepts, connects random dots, and sees the big picture… then happily hands everything over to someone else to actually build and finish.
Because the ideation phase is pure dopamine.

[zerohedge @zerohedge]

*WALMART HEIR LUKAS WALTON TO BUY STAKE IN NBA'S CHICAGO BULLS

[General Will🇦🇷🇺🇸 @GamecockWill69]

Thinking about the ultimate rot day I had last year #missit

[Barstool Chicago @barstoolchicago]

If you live in Chicago and can throw a baseball over 70 MPH, be at Wrigley tomorrow at 9 AM.

Open tryouts.

[Chuck Todd @chucktodd]

This is a pretty high profile promise to break. Reminder how fixing one bad story can create new ones. All of this reporting is from the tax returns the campaign released to prove he met the 7-year residency requirement. https://t.co/HOHTPJaWMG