The PROcrastinator

Sorry I didn’t text you back. I’ll get around to it. **PFP art by @sami_jen, character design by @OneWadeAway

[BlackSword @Blacksword011]

What men don’t understand about the mental load

[ce n'est pas erica @sourhoestarter]

affirmation: you will be back to your own schedule in your 2x2 apartment that you overpay for soon enough. your family’s smothering love, a mere aberration. everyone understands your niche references. you will feel skinny and sexy once again.

[Yunie ૮ ․ ․ ྀིა @Hyeyunie]

You think I’m strict now you should have met me when I was a toddler. I’ve mellowed out over the years

[joy-con eater @foconut_]

i frequently worry that everyone in my life may at any random point abandon me without warning. eggs benedict from scratch

[@ratlimit @ratlimit]

Just brought my girlfriend’s boyfriend his bedtime tea. Decided to take a risk… I did not fill it to his preferred level. Not to worry!—‘twas all for a zinger: “Look who has the low ‘tea’ levels *now* !” 🤣

Guess who earned a lil nightynight snuggle with Princess 😎

[Jai-Zia Dax 🧘🏾‍♀️ @DreadedJai]

“When we decline to speak ill of the dead, it’s because we have compassion for the living. In this respect, I am sorry for Kirk’s children. I don’t know if Kirk was a good father, but if he was, that does little to mitigate the damage he did to other people’s children.”

[Joyce Carol Oates @JoyceCarolOates]

oh. he speaks to you often? are you a Diet Coke?

[CDR Nobody @CdrNobody]

@melissa Pilates? Isn't that the thing that killed Jesus? He's right to be cautious.

[The Sensitive Warrior @coffeetime33]

It’s not jingling to you that I’m standing on christmas

[RWBY @OfficialRWBY]

Looks like @kerryshawcross has an update for us 👀

[⛓️ G W Ξ N ‼︎ @POISONOMICON]

first they came for the ice miners on europa, and I did not speak out — because I was not an ice miner. then they came for orc city,

[BOOP @Pettyyyboop]

I like to throw soy sauce at sad people. Kikkoman while he’s down.

[WBR @W_B_Rick]

“No artistic merit” shut the fuck up and watch the 2014 Spurs nerd

[ehime ora @ehimeora]

I hate being around people who mistake my childlike wonder as naivety or weakness. I am simply a war general who loves to giggle.

[scribbles @CatEnjoyer]

WE ALREADY KNOW WHO 🥕

[໊ @sonohoor]

i love when people say “that’s so you” it feels good to know i exist and have a vibe

[The PROcrastinator @ThatKidAtFAU]

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