the batfink

They couldn't hit an elephant at this dis

[the batfink @TheBatfink]

Here's the difference.
Every human wants to be the star of his or her life story.
Every dog just wants to be best boy

[the batfink @TheBatfink]

@PaulKinkel Ah, a mere 40 years ago…
We didn’t do that one too badly, as I recall

[the batfink @TheBatfink]

@PaulKinkel Hey, back atcha!
And a happy new year

[the batfink @TheBatfink]

@ChexMix
Sorry, but you guys kinda jumped the shark with “chextra cheesy” Chex mix.

[the batfink @TheBatfink]

Hey @Yahoo
Are you actually trying to get rid of old users? Your verification scheme allows 50 seconds but the email containing the code doesn’t arrive until about 5 minutes later

[the batfink @TheBatfink]

@gtconway3d One Of Several Remaining Mohicans

[the batfink @TheBatfink]

To achieve my next level of crankdom, I will be putting up “suggestions” boxes in commercial establishments that do not already have them.
I will of course include a starter entry with each box.
(Obviously can’t use “get a suggestions box” for that)

[the batfink @TheBatfink]

Yeah, that’s nearly as much fun as guessing in sudoku

[the batfink @TheBatfink]

I blame Big Toothpaste for giving me such a ridiculously distorted idea of what a tube should look like

[the batfink @TheBatfink]

He’s right behind me, isn’t he
(Me, standing in the ocean with a few friends after disparaging the great white shark’s dental hygiene)

[UConn @UConn]

"Fast Fallen Women" is the third book in the “Fast … Women” series that Board of Trustees Distinguished Professor in English Gina Barreca has edited – and this one contains 30 essays from UConn emeritus faculty, staff, and graduates. https://t.co/XfEA9DbWPg

[the batfink @TheBatfink]

His mom told him and his brother,“set your asses down at the piano and start practicing“

[the batfink @TheBatfink]

@SirEviscerate Hey, that would be great.
Thank you!

[the batfink @TheBatfink]

It is such a relief that my wheelbarrow has a pneumatic tire.
I would hate to bruise my dirt

[the batfink @TheBatfink]

I believe you meant “Percy Sledge”…

[the batfink @TheBatfink]

Kind of disappointed that the crossword answer for “game typically played in the dark” did not turn out to be lawn darts

[the batfink @TheBatfink]

@HMittelmark And of course talent does tend to pool in the pinkies, particularly after riding in an elevator

[the batfink @TheBatfink]

Hooray for @thejollybeggars playing out in the open air!

[the batfink @TheBatfink]

@HMittelmark Yes.
Wait, did you mean “a tweet” or “the tweet”?

[the batfink @TheBatfink]

Another One Of Many, Many, Many Mohicans
#BoringFilms

[the batfink @TheBatfink]

To Live And Get Old In LA #BoringFilms