Bernard

I'm just a cat who can't say no. I can't say much really on account of being a cat. I seem to be able to type though, so that's nice.

[Bernard @TheCatBernard]

Won't somebody rid me of this troublesome dog?

[Bernard @TheCatBernard]

FUCKSAKE. Do one, bollock breath. Rt@Cumberbark: The cat is a meanie but he's still BRILLIANT really!

[Bernard @TheCatBernard]

@Cumberbark fuck off dog.

[Bernard @TheCatBernard]

.@Cumberbark Bellend.

[Bernard @TheCatBernard]

That dog's a fucking bellend.

[Bernard @TheCatBernard]

Been offline for a while. Arseholes don't clean themselves.

[Bernard @TheCatBernard]

@cunabula Look at my shiny pink anus.

[Bernard @TheCatBernard]

I'm. Too sexy for your bullshit.

[Bernard @TheCatBernard]

Piss off, all of you. Wankers.

[Bernard @TheCatBernard]

FUCKING WEEKEND INNIT!

same as any other day

Just lickin' my anus

Delish

[Bernard @TheCatBernard]

@fayelouisecoop My friendship is negotiable. How much catnip you got?

[Bernard @TheCatBernard]

@fayelouisecoop PICK ANOTHER SONG, FUCKO.

[Bernard @TheCatBernard]

@fayelouisecoop @laylajadetaylor Fuck this, I'm off for a lie down.

[Bernard @TheCatBernard]

@laylajadetaylor @fayeLouiseCoop Only yesterday I had to eat a mouse, lick my anus AND sleep for 18 hrs. You couldn't multitask like that

[Bernard @TheCatBernard]

@laylajadetaylor @fayeLouiseCoop I've been licking my balls since 8am and you think that's easy?!

[Bernard @TheCatBernard]

Shut up.

[Bernard @TheCatBernard]

@WeePotatoes thanks for digging and rearranging the flowerbeds. It really made shitting in all of them feel "brand new" x

[Bernard @TheCatBernard]

@FayeLouiseCoop ATTA GIRL!

[Bernard @TheCatBernard]

@fayelouisecoop In your position I would do a big stinky shit in their suitcases. HTH!

[Bernard @TheCatBernard]

Yeah! It still fits! Shut up, it does.