The Elder Zoomer

Remember Masculinity |

Conservative Man, Husband, Father, Son, Brother, and Friend.

[The Elder Zoomer @ThePaceForward]

It is time to put pen to paper, as ever man has in times of great strife, and begin the uphill climb toward goodness. Hopefully, these grant you some level of edification, enjoyment, and perspective.
https://t.co/VgLgceV6sm

[The Elder Zoomer @ThePaceForward]

I'm #5 of 12, but I'm confident that I would. My parents are Based like that

[Derrik Behler (BEE-Ler) @DPGBehler]

Maybe. I was my mom’s second but my dad’s forth. Complicated story.

[The Elder Zoomer @ThePaceForward]

@RealDeanCain That awkward moment when Superman doesn't like heights

[The Elder Zoomer @ThePaceForward]

@DPGBehler Oh gosh. DiGiorno is awful!

[The Elder Zoomer @ThePaceForward]

@HomemakingLady Ah, Calvinists. So charitable, so moral, so much better than you and me

[The Elder Zoomer @ThePaceForward]

@pureMetatron 1) Guns
2) The one you do consistently
3) Krav maga

[Dr. Abby Johnson @AbbyJohnson]

@_wej01 This isn’t an abortion.

[Dan Hightower @Danhightower]

@smalltown_wife Don't get me started. I think there should be a whole medical program for soon to be parents that doesn't exist.

[Dan Hightower @Danhightower]

Daycare calls me. That's never good.

For them.

Daycare: "your son hurt his elbow and won't move his arm. Can you come take him to a doctor's office?"

Me (ex Special Forces Medic): "A real doctor is on the way to you now. I am 6 mikes out. Alert me of status changes."

I arrive at daycare. I locate the patient. 21 month old male. Scene is not safe. I drag the patient to cover and concealment behind a seesaw, away from the other small terrorists in the AO.

I begin my assessment. Blood sweep negative for massive hemorrhage. Mental status: conscious and verbal but confused (answers "dada" when asked for blood type). One breath every 2 seconds. Bilateral rise and fall of the chest. Strong carotid pulse, strong bilat radial pulse.

Teeth and tongue intact no blood no mucus no dip or foreign objects. Eyes PERRLA, negative JVD/trach deviation, C-spine intact upon palpation.

Heart sounds strong upon auscultation. Percussion negative for hemo-T. Abdominal quads normal upon palpation. Pelvis negative for book sign.

Arms and legs negative for crepitus. However, Patient indicates discomfort in right arm upon palpation and supination/flexion of the elbow.

Nursemaid's elbow.

I begin interventions. Supination/flexion technique complete at 1215. Palpable clunk on successful reduction. I write the time on his chest in Sharpie. I tape a popsicle to his hand and tell the patient to suck but do not bite/chew. I write "1 x popsicle (10g sugar)" on his chest in Sharpie.

I reassess the patient after performing interventions then package the patient for handoff to daycare/higher level of care. I yell at daycare over the Blackhawk in my head: "21 month old male!!! Nursemaids elbow!!! Treated with supination/flexion technique at 1215!!! Patient has 1 x popsicle onboard!!"

Daycare: "sir please leave."

Me: "you should have called my wife."

[The Elder Zoomer @ThePaceForward]

@Timcast Even better, let:
Clubs be Jumping Jacks
Diamonds be Push-ups
Spades be Pull-ups
Hearts be Squats

(I can't do nearly that many pull-ups)

[Spencer A. Klavan @SpencerKlavan]

Oh Sinon, the villainous agent of death-dealing subterfuge? Huh.

[The Elder Zoomer @ThePaceForward]

@Timcast Sir, this is a Starbucks

[The Elder Zoomer @ThePaceForward]

Thoughts:
1) *Ellen. Names matter and this chick is no Elliot
2) Sinon isn't from either The Odyssey or even the Iliad, but the Aenid. Bro is doing too much
3) Sinon is still a dude and this is still a horrible affirmation of her delusions

[Christopher Nolan Archives @NolanAnalyst]

OFFICIAL: Elliot Page will play Sinon in Christopher Nolan’s THE ODYSSEY, not Achilles.

[The Elder Zoomer @ThePaceForward]

Love it

[HuffPost @HuffPost]

Our @pollsterpolls model gives @HillaryClinton a 98.1% chance of winning the presidency https://t.co/E9mjH42Sa4

[The Elder Zoomer @ThePaceForward]

Finally getting around to the @JeremyDBoreing podcast.
Simply put, it is Good.

I don't clearly know what all went down with @realDailyWire and him, but I know that his is a voice of reason, prudence, humility, and clarity. A welcome contrast to the sensationalized mongering

[The Elder Zoomer @ThePaceForward]

@elcidmkii @IndianaBrunner Real presence? Sure; yes, even
Transubstantiation? Absolutely not

[The Elder Zoomer @ThePaceForward]

@1Tim2verse4 @FreddyLA7

[The Elder Zoomer @ThePaceForward]

@Andrewnsnyder @catholic_comedy The Last Crusade for sure

[The Elder Zoomer @ThePaceForward]

@catholic_comedy The Incredibles

[The Elder Zoomer @ThePaceForward]

Hopefully regular old organic intelligence

[Tristan Rhee @Tristanrhee3]

What's coming after artificial intelligence?