Shon Kale

[The Green Kasey 🎃 @RawbertBeef]

Me when I smell a pie cooling on a nearby windowsill:

[Freddy @FredZillaa]

Hearing her speak for the first time and finding out that only Yoda does the weird speech thing was so fucking funny dude

[sonya 💖 @sonyashea3]

olivia rodrigo put CRACK COCAINE in expectations omfg

[Misael Muñoz @misaelmunozc]

Así me siento a mis 36 años escuchando el disco de Olivia Rodrigo.

[SecondAmendment @SecondAmendment]

FYI for anyone visiting Texas....

If they charge for Chips and Salsa, they are NOT a legitimate Mexican restaraunt.

Do not eat there.

Leave immediately.

Call the police and report fraud.

[Lyn🦋 @_ayandamay]

I want a refund on every minute I spent in 8th grade learning that monopolies are illegal and that our government would protect us from greedy men....

[dummy 👻(^人^)⚜ @stpdgrlgbf]

being a gacha player is so funny because wdym i know i got a 5* when the pull screen took 20ms longer to load

[TABBY @verypalehipster]

If it happens at a Knicks game it will be the greatest moment in basketball and American history

[jeffy @retrojeff3]

fuck data centers. all my homies hate data centers

[Charlotte @Charpercy84]

Natural boobs will always beat fake boobs

[Winter @LeftyWinter]

I need Democratic States to immediately cease building data centers and ban them.

This is in a RED State.

[RC Ruler @Xenosaiyan]

To ALL Honkai Star Rail fans

Gilgamesh is a misogynistic king who got defeated in a misogyny competition by a cannibalistic lesbian

He has a non-binary lover & swings every way

He will out woke you
He will out conservative you
He is undefeatable
He has never won a single fight

[KaRAYgeous TRANTIFA ☽☾🩷💜💙🪻 @kraywhiseheart]

Dua Lupa puts all the other artists who’ve made compromises with Zionists to shame!

[BuBBliK @k1rallik]

> be Henry Cavill
> born on a tiny British island no one can find on a map
> bullied at boarding school. they call you "Fat Cavill"
> lose 21 lbs for your first film role at 17
> miss Batman. Christian Bale gets it
> miss Bond. Daniel Craig gets it
> miss Superman. Brandon Routh gets it
> they call you the unluckiest man in Hollywood
> Zack Snyder calls. you're playing World of Warcraft
> miss the call
> call back immediately. say you were "saving a life"
> become the first non-American Superman in history
> bench press the entire DC universe
> Netflix offers you The Witcher. you read all the books first
> they take both roles away anyway

Happy 43rd birthday to the most over-qualified man in Hollywood

[Jeffrey K 🍉 @JayFreaKay]

Someone on TikTok predicted human made products and experiences will be perceived as a luxury in future and we are already heading there.

The moment I see AI in your ad or copy I automatically do not want to buy your product.

[MC Squared @mcsquared34]

Fuck the Flock

https://t.co/WZLNQdWUgO

[DR JANE RUBY™️ @RealDrJaneRuby]

🚨ALERT‼️ There are over 100,000 Flock Cameras In the United States as of today.

BTW each one contains 3 g of gold, almost $100 worth of silver, and enough copper wire to choke a horse. 🤔🤔

Learn everything you can about them: https://t.co/khf93E6hd5

[Jason Bassler @JasonBassler1]

⚠️ Definitely DO NOT point a 1000nm wavelength green laser at Flock cameras. It totally won't damage the sensor and render the camera ineffective.

So please don't consider it, okay?

[David Hines @hradzka]

the hardest part of the whole deal wouldn’t be keeping quiet or not spending anything, but keeping my wife from noticing that I am at all times extremely relaxed