The Squishie

artist, techie, writer, gamer and cannabis sommelier 🌿🌺🍷

[The Squishie @TheSquishie]

@WorkMemesDaily 44

[Employee Tears @EmployeeTears]

If I died and went straight to hell, it would take me a week to realize I wasn't at work anymore.

[Mcgregor Mackenzie 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 @mcgregormackenz]

If 9/11 happened in the UK the government would have told us that the Hijackers were just trying to steal printer ink from the offices.

[The Squishie @TheSquishie]

@ADHDForReal Feels like a day that ends in "y". Feels like guilt and shame and looming sense of doom for not doing whatever it is, which serves to only continue the spiral toward lying paralytic in the recliner.

[The Squishie @TheSquishie]

@woofknight Facts.

[Nuelxx @nuel_szy]

If you have ADHD and you cannot fall asleep without something playing, that is your brain asking for one steady input so it stops generating 40 of its own. The show is a handrail. Silence is where the argument from 2011 lives.

[The Squishie @TheSquishie]

@Asmongold

[MAX CHADWICK @maxchadwick]

POV: your crew is coming back to WoW Forever for “one last time.”

[The Squishie @TheSquishie]

@lanechanged My engagement ring. 😥

[The Squishie @TheSquishie]

@ThatEricAlper Beatles Love Songs, a double album set in a brown sleeve, with a songbook of lyrics. I was 5.

[San Diego Sheriff @SDSheriff]

WANTED: Sexually Violent Predator

On September 25, 2026 at approximately 3:30 a.m., Sexually Violent Predator Merle Wakefield's (DOB: 04/10/1957) GPS device alerted to "Tamper Mode" while working in Rancho Bernardo in the City of San Diego. Wakefield is supervised by Liberty Health Care (LHC) as part of the State's Conditional Release Program.

LHC responded to the scene and discovered that Wakefield's GPS had been removed and Wakefield was no longer at the location.

LHC notified the San Diego County Sheriff's Office and the San Diego Police Department.

Wakefield is currently wanted for violating the terms of his conditional release. He was convicted in 1980 and 1991 of lewd or lascivious acts with a child under 14 years old and rape by force. Wakefield has been on conditional release since November 2024.

Wakefield stands 5'10" tall, weighs 230 pounds and has brown eyes.

If you see Wakefield, DO NOT APPROACH OR CONTACT HIM. Contact your local law enforcement law enforcement agency or call 9-1-1.

@SanDiegoPD

[National Park Service @NatlParkService]

Well, I waddle outta bed, and I’m ready for some fishin’
Score myself some salmon nutrition
Chomp and chew and live the FAT BEAR life.

Dip in the water and the salmon start jumpin’
Out on the bank, my belly starts plumpin’
With bears like me at the falls from 9 to 5!

#9to5Day

[The Squishie @TheSquishie]

@CallahanAutoCo With Hollandaise sauce. It's game-changing.

[The Squishie @TheSquishie]

@GrowingUpRetro Brut and Marlboro Reds

[The Squishie @TheSquishie]

@ThatEricAlper This was during the Cold War and everyone was concerned about nuclear war. Admittedly, my anxiety has bells on it, but this terrified me as a possibility.

[The Squishie @TheSquishie]

@mrmikeMTL Mountain Dew, coconut water and most hard spirits 🤢

[D Mk @wickedsmaahht]

Have you ever noticed we live in a country where a 95-year-old man can walk into a mud pit in Chicago, call his band The Fuckers, and start reciting “Enter Sandman” like he’s giving a TED Talk from the afterlife?

William Shatner. Ninety-five. Riot Fest. Douglass Park. Thirty-five minutes. Spoken-word heavy metal. In the mud. With people cheering like this is normal.

It is not normal. It is magnificent.

He did “Crazy Train.” He did “Ace of Spades.” He did Metallica. Not sang them. Talked them. Like Captain Kirk got trapped in a guitar amp and decided to negotiate with Satan instead of the Klingons.

Behind him: actual musicians. Marcus Nand. Phil Soussan. Grown men who have paid rent with real notes while a nonagenarian stands there going, “What the F is heavy metal?” and somehow makes it a question worth answering.

Brian May is on the record. Tony Iommi is on the record. The album is called *What the F Is Heavy Metal?* which is the most honest title in music since someone first admitted most of it is just louder complaining.

The crowd ate it up. Of course they did. We will watch a man old enough to remember radio as furniture stand in wet dirt and dare death to tap him on the shoulder. Death probably took one look, said “I’m not dealing with this today,” and went to find someone easier.

You’re never too old to live out your dreams. That’s the line they always use. The real line is: most people quit the second it gets embarrassing. Shatner waited until embarrassing became the whole act, then sold tickets.

Follow @wickedsmaahht before the rest of the timeline figures it out.

#WilliamShatner #RiotFest #WhatTheFIsHeavyMetal #NeverTooOld #SpokenWordMetal #LiveLongAndGetLouder #CaptainKirkHasEnteredTheChat

[The Squishie @TheSquishie]

@mariana057 The Lanterns. I think I'm fucked.

[The Squishie @TheSquishie]

@Fatima_30e Leave the shithole apartment I live in and find somewhere peaceful to enjoy. Anything besides a post-war apartment building with no insulation and aluminum windows.

[The Squishie @TheSquishie]

@lady_valor_07 Taylor Swift and anyone else who can't sing without special effects.