𝚂𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚑

Tweeting in the style to which I have become accustomed. Now on 🦋 as '@smash.la.rki.ng'

[𝚂𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚑 @The_Smash]

Angie, Tara, Helen and Doris

These are a few of my favourite flings.

[𝚂𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚑 @The_Smash]

Make social media great again: choose blue🦋sky?
https://t.co/cOExy4Qu1M

[𝚂𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚑 @The_Smash]

Post-pandemic pop. Loopy things are a-happening.

[𝚂𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚑 @The_Smash]

@AdotOkonkwo Forgive the indirect contact, I can't get hold of Alison's phone to plunder her contacts! Can you have a look at this for me https://t.co/vv0YnBu9Ub.

[𝚂𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚑 @The_Smash]

@kissifer Feel for you, Sir. It isn't pleasant.

[𝚂𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚑 @The_Smash]

I just rescued Woody, Buzz & Bo Peep from the front of the house. They'd been thrown from a window at 3am in the rain. S'like they'd been interrupted in the middle of an escape adventure from the film. They're now pretending to be just toys, drying by the radiator #ASD #ToyStory

[𝚂𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚑 @The_Smash]

@BerylWallxx @boff_jim @ClearlyPossible @JimMFelton I'm the primary carer for my 2 children. I'm male. Casual misandry is everywhere in my world. I won't generalise of course. Just airing an alternative viewpoint.

[𝚂𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚑 @The_Smash]

The school holidays are going to be looooong

[𝚂𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚑 @The_Smash]

Got the pool out.

It's a biggun so it takes a while to fill.

James shat in it as soon as he emitted his first satisfied sigh of submerged relaxation.

[𝚂𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚑 @The_Smash]

The pool is currently emptying its fetid Jameslurry onto the lawn with a scowling Matilda watching it, arms folded in fury at the injustice of it all.

[George Pointon @GeorgePointon_]

I asked my year 1 classes
'If you could time travel, where would you go?'
Here is my analysis
A THREAD

[𝚂𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚑 @The_Smash]

These frustrating moments are triggering my Brexiety. Also my Branger at Brexclusion. I'm not usually a violent person but every time it happens I imagine myself slapping Boris Johnson in the chops. That helps. A little.

#BrexitReality

[𝚂𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚑 @The_Smash]

Happy Birthday @kissifer

[𝚂𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚑 @The_Smash]

Keep your eyes on the side of that bus folks, let the words of that fluffy-haired man wash over you. Imagine it's you *personally* giving £350m to the beloved NHS and relax... just put your cross in the box marked 'Leave'... that's right... now ssshhh...

https://t.co/GqGk5YnCAu

[𝚂𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚑 @The_Smash]

@kissifer The difference in response of the security forces compared with the BLM marches a few months ago is striking.

[𝚂𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚑 @The_Smash]

Does this work (on any level)?

She's 7 years old.

https://t.co/6pPkRb5CRQ

[𝚂𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚑 @The_Smash]

No Christmas jumper for me this year. Instead, I'll be wearing a Fleece Navidad.

[𝚂𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚑 @The_Smash]

At this time of year, George Smiley used to cover himself with Polos and Fox's Glaciers and After Eights.

Mint Spy.

#JohnLeCarre

[𝚂𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚑 @The_Smash]

Took him for a walk along the canal. I followed wherever he led us. This time it was a multistorey car park where enjoyed the sound of the echoes from our whooping. On the way home we pretended to do sneezes. He laughed a lot. #ASD