Ultra

Writer of much fanfic, occasional maker of fanvids and fanart, fan of many fandoms, shipper of many ships.

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

It’s bright, sunny and quite warm, but raining a bit on and off, and quite cold when the sun goes in. I wish I had a “bright, sunny and quite warm, but raining a bit on and off, and quite cold when the sun goes in” coat… but I don’t.

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

I’m branching out into motivational speaking. Join me in starting the day by repeating this message of positivity:

“All of today’s disasters will be small and bearable, the people I encounter will be mostly tolerable, the weather will be suitable for most activities, and if all else fails I will always have tea and biscuits. I will have an adequate day and it’ll be bedtime before I know it. Amen.”

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

I’m going to be sick of summer by the time summer’s here.

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

“At least it can't get any worse”

Well done, you just set the universe a challenge it can't refuse.

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

I’m so busy deciding how to waste the day that I’m wasting the day in an unsatisfying way!

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

Knowing a British person’s day has gone badly when you hear them say, “well isn’t that just marvellous”

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

<Television reporter voice>

Well, hello, you join me here for another day of doing jobs, which we’ll be doing throughout the day until bedtime.

These jobs will include doing stuff, dealing with stuff, organising stuff, looking at stuff, thinking about stuff, putting up with stuff, moaning about stuff, fixing stuff, buying stuff, grinning and bearing stuff, and generally just hoping stuff turns out okay.

At various points we will also be eating and drinking stuff to keep up enough energy to continue doing stuff.

Hopefully by the end of the day, enough stuff will have been done so that we can tick off that stuff and have a manageable amount of stuff to continue with the next day.

If anyone’s not feeling well today, I hope you’re able to take a break from stuff for a short while, before continuing with stuff at a later time.

One day the need to do stuff will end, but today is not that day.

Wishing everyone doing stuff today the best of luck with all their stuff. More news as we have it.

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

Just said sorry to a cupboard door. I am Britishing strongly today.

[Wh*donesque @whedonesque]

I’d like to test that theory

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

Growing up British is being told you’re daft as a brush and if you don’t stop playing silly beggars and acting the goat you’ll get a clip round the ear.

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

Life advice:

Have a cup of tea, say “ah well”, and
move on.

[Ultra @TheyCallMeUltra]

@westwingwolf

[Susie Dent @susie_dent]

Word of the day is ‘forswunk’ (13th century): exhausted by work.

I like to add ‘foreswunk’, exhausted before you even begin.

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

I don’t know how to stress this enough to the culprits, but when you look at an item on a supermarket shelf, your trolley does not need to turn out sideways across the whole aisle at the same time.

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

“I'm not sure if I fancy it”

Translation: I'd rather roll down a hill made of mousetraps.

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

Not officially completing any task until you've said “right, that's that done”

[Wh*donesque @whedonesque]

Spike: “A bear! You made a bear!”

Buffy: “I didn't mean to!”

Spike: “Undo it! Undo it!”

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

Fantastic weekend for cancelling plans.

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

Great day for looking out of the window with a cup of tea and your hand on your hip.

[VeryBritishProblems @SoVeryBritish]

The news says today is a “Multi-Hazard Weather Event”. I’m old enough to remember when we’d just use the shortened version: “wet and windy”