Yes, healing is hard.
Becoming the best version of yourself isn’t meant to be easy.
Not healing is also hard. Re-living generational trauma cycles is hard. Being stuck is hard.
We get to choose our version of hard.
An emotionally immature partner will believe it's your role to make them happy or to change to make them comfortable.
An emotionally mature partner is aware relationships have ups and downs and ebbs and flows. They'll be able to tolerate the boredom or discomfort of long term commitment. They won't expect to feel head over heals in love, consistently.
They're not looking for a fairy tale, they're ready to do the work.
What would life look like if you took responsibility for your own life instead of everyone else’s? If you helped yourself for once? If you allowed yourself to move on? If you allowed yourself to have and receive? If you showed yourself the same grace you show others? What would that look like?
Real love makes you feel safe enough to be soft. Real love makes you feel open enough to be vulnerable. Real love makes you feel good enough to just be yourself. & that’s the beauty of unconditional love—you won’t have to try so hard to be loved. You just are.
I saw a video on TikTok that talked about the importance of recognizing bids in your relationship and leaning in when they arise.
For example, your partner getting excited about something and wanting to share it with you, and the importance of acknowledging them/connecting.
Successful relationships aren’t about two healed people coming together to have the perfect relationship.
They’re about unhealed people having the courage to show the parts of themselves they usually hide.
They’re about unhealed people learning how to ask for help, accept help, and build security.
They’re about unhealed people forgiving themselves and each other over and over again.
They're about unhealed people crying together on the kitchen floor as they repair after conflict.
They're about unhealed people learning how to leave fight or flight.
You're going to start a new workout, launch that project, or create a new habit. Then you get stuck in your mind and tell yourself you'll start tomorrow.
It's an endless cycle of beating yourself up.
How to get out of analysis paralysis:
Steven Yeun and Ali Wong absolutely killed in their performances . The drama, humor, and heartfelt emotion within the screen was amazing. Generational trauma, expectations, and the burden of repressed fury was FELT. Definitely will sit with me for a long time. #BEEFNetflix