Michael Humberto

[Michael Humberto @ThirdGuy]

@ontometaphorist congratulations! 🕳️

i trust it was uneventful

[Michael Humberto @ThirdGuy]

is this a tweet or what

[Michael Humberto @ThirdGuy]

@davidshepardson annual hot dog day was our idea

[Michael Humberto @ThirdGuy]

@btown88 idk man… k2-3 d has a nice rhythm

[Michael Humberto @ThirdGuy]

i flew halfway around the world to see mr pardo tonight. ok not halfway… and not just to see him. but it sounds much better than “o nice, i’ll be in town”

[Jimmy Pardo @jimmypardo]

Just two days until I return to eastern Michigan! Ann Arbor, to be specific! Come join me for any of the 3 shows at @aacomedy on 7-14/15 - https://t.co/jGlKV2TDdS
Here's a photo of me showing off my bottom teeth!

[Michael Humberto @ThirdGuy]

@michaelianblack the depth of field on that scenery is amazing

[Jack Colton @btown88]

This is the greatest video I’ve ever seen in my life.

[Michael Humberto @ThirdGuy]

@btown88 i did NOT expect to enjoy that as much as i did

[Michael Humberto @ThirdGuy]

@ellenwhite are you really ellen g white? or just pretending to be?

[Michael Humberto @ThirdGuy]

abcd

[Michael Humberto @ThirdGuy]

I cannot believe @Crayola didn’t apologize!

[Monica Osborne @DrMonicaOsborne]

Good lord…

[Alec Sulkin @thesulk]

Can’t believe I’ve lived long enough to not care about Dune twice.

[Michael Humberto @ThirdGuy]

the same people who argue that beating helps children to be good are getting all sweaty and shaky because someone isn’t respectfully sucking the national anthem's dick.

[Michael Humberto @ThirdGuy]

peta has humped the shark

[PETA @peta]

Words matter, and as our understanding of social justice evolves, our language evolves along with it. Here’s how to remove speciesism from your daily conversations.

[Michael Humberto @ThirdGuy]

nice statement. when is jared gonna tell you what it means?

[Donald J. Trump @realDonaldTrump]

Statement from President Donald J. Trump and First Lady Melania Trump on the Passing of Former President George H.W. Bush

[Michael Humberto @ThirdGuy]

@btown88 this is like when adam carolla started fighting the podcast patent trolls. all i could think was "please god can't they both lose?"

[jan @janhopis]

I like the wikipedia pages which basically seem to be written for aliens who have never visited the planet before

[Michael Humberto @ThirdGuy]

looks more like he loves the way you "think" https://t.co/JMuJDD1O2X

[Candace Owens @RealCandaceO]

He loves the way I think.

@DonaldJTrumpJr https://t.co/vZqCJC5bXs

[Michael Humberto @ThirdGuy]

@michelleisawolf over on fb my friends and i are agreeing you were great. one says he was offended, but he likes to quote tucker carlson.