Lima Time

Father of 2 amazing boys. Bald, Divorced Cameraman. Love of BACON, Whiskey, Midgets, Duct Tape and Hockey. You had me at funny.

[Just a girl @dammit_amy]

My mind is like that old closet

Dark and dirty

[MMEEGGSS @mmeeggss1218]

Is there a gold medal for " pulling a muscle while putting on pants"?

[Lima Time @TightFollow]

So far the best line of the day is 13 telling 10,
"Don't stick your fingers in your mouth after touching your balls."

[eEric @ericsshadow]

I'm from a small town where everyone is friendly unless you're from a different town or have a different opinion about anything. Great town.

[Ginger Snapped ❤ @katy_fit]

Arguing with a Woman

Are you right?
/ \
Yes No
\ /
You Lose

[Just a girl @dammit_amy]

Is it possible to OD on bacon?

[Just a girl @dammit_amy]

Life is much more tolerable when you're *relaxed.

*drunk

[Ginger Snapped ❤ @katy_fit]

*permanent resident of the time-out chair.

[Lima Time @TightFollow]

Hey, I climbed a mountain. Can I use the saying now, "can I climb your mountains?"

[Just a girl @dammit_amy]

There's something about you that makes me feel like a dangerous woman.

Must be the knife under my pillow.

[Lima Time @TightFollow]

We have a Code Blue Balls. Boner down.

[Just a girl @dammit_amy]

I'm thankful to my mom for teaching me about religion....

"You'd better pray that comes out of the carpet"

[Just a girl @dammit_amy]

I'm at the "Sure, why the hell not" stage in life.

Life is too short not to have fun.

[Lima Time @TightFollow]

Boobs are like gold, you just have to look or dig.

[Just a girl @dammit_amy]

We are all just one bad decision away from holding a card board sign on the corner at walmart.

[Just a girl @dammit_amy]

Normal is for everyone else

[Just a girl @dammit_amy]

Was just serenaded by a smelly homeless man at a bus stop.

Sad to admit that's the highlight of my love life.

[Just a girl @dammit_amy]

Apparently yelling

"Lift with your legs son, not your labia"

is a fantastic way to be invited to check out a different gym.

[Michael @avg_gen_xer]

What's a guy have to do to get sexually harassed or have inappropriate pictures sent to around here?

[Just a girl @dammit_amy]

Ya know what? Fat looks better tan.