Tim Jensen

Family, sports, and friends matter. Rams, Laker and Dodger fan for life. Love to surf, eat, drink & watch films.

[Tim Jensen @TimGoose3]

This is what life is all about. Own it and succeed. Well done young man.

[FeelGoodThoughts @feelgoodtale]

My son announced on Tuesday evening, during dinner, that for Halloween he wanted to dress up as a fart.

I literally almost choked on the water I was drinking. He’s six years old. He was just sitting there, serious, with spaghetti sauce on his chin, saying: “I want to be a big brown fart cloud.” My husband looked at me like it was my job to handle the situation. I didn’t know what to say. Where do kids even get these ideas? I told him absolutely not. To pick something normal — a superhero, a dinosaur, anything else. He made that stubborn face that means “he’s never going to let this go.”

He started explaining to me, with the utmost seriousness, that farts are funny, that everyone would laugh, and that it would be the best costume ever. I was exhausted after work, my head was pounding, and I lost my patience. I said: fine. You want to be a fart? Make it yourself. I’ll help you find the materials, but the rest is up to you. I thought he’d give up after ten minutes. He didn’t.
He spent the next three days in the living room, working with brown and beige fabrics I helped him order, because apparently he needed “fart-colored tulle” — a phrase I never thought I’d say. He watched tutorials on my phone about how to gather fabric, asked me for help with the knots, but insisted on arranging every single layer himself. He got frustrated twice, was close to crying, but kept going. His little hands working carefully, his tongue between his teeth as he focused.

Yesterday he finished. He put it on and strutted around the house, proudly showing it off to his father and grandmother, who both looked absolutely stunned. I thought I’d be embarrassed, but instead I felt a strange pride. My son said he wanted to be a fart, I told him to figure it out himself, and he… actually did it.

He’s been sleeping in it for two nights. Two neighbors have already asked if I can make one for their kids, too. I told them he’s taking orders now. Eight dollars per cloud. He’s never been so confident in his life.

[Tim Jensen @TimGoose3]

Clown show

[Dave Portnoy @stoolpresidente]

Shocker

[Dave Portnoy @stoolpresidente]

Shocker

[Tim Jensen @TimGoose3]

@latsondheimer Yet no one cares…..

[Tim Jensen @TimGoose3]

@ClutchPoints @FirstTake What would they put that loser back on TV?

[Tim Jensen @TimGoose3]

@ClutchPoints You get paid to say this? How much research did that take? Wow you’re brilliant, never thought about it this way.

[Tim Jensen @TimGoose3]

@jasonrmcintyre Neither can play defense at the next level.

[Tim Jensen @TimGoose3]

My guy @geeter3 preaching. Both Chris and Luka are built different in case you were wondering

[Spectrum SportsNet @SpectrumSN]

Our Access SportsNet crew breaks down how the Lakers are stacking wins, Luka’s scoring surge, and the team’s belief right now.

[Tim Jensen @TimGoose3]

Hell of an article. Well written and great point. It’s a new generation who truly only think about themselves and the tiktok culture got them there.

[Dan Wolken @DanWolken]

Eileen Gu may compete for China - a fact that generates a lot of takes on Twitter.

But the only entity she truly represents is Eileen Gu, Inc.

My ⁦@YahooSports⁩ column. https://t.co/BqXJ6nUnEi

[TheTruth @TheTruth8240]

After Draymond Committed a Flagrant Foul on Austin Reaves, Lebron instead of having his back is protecting Draymond Green SMH

Fukn 🤡

[Jon Root @JonnyRoot_]

@TheTennisLetter Get this reporter out of the press room. Your job to talk about sports, not bait American athletes into saying something controversial and anti-conservative.

@TheAthletic & @AustralianOpen, get Owen Lewis out of there.

[Tim Jensen @TimGoose3]

My guy killing it on and off the court.

[espnW @espnW]

Texas volleyball coach Jerritt Elliott is bald, but he solved the sport's ponytail problem with the invention of a unique hair-tie that has taken over the NCAA.
https://t.co/6fxt9aE53s

[Tim Jensen @TimGoose3]

Wait did he play tonight or was this from 2024?

[Bleacher Report @BleacherReport]

VINTAGE KAWHI AS TIME EXPIRES 🔥🔥🔥

(via @LAClippers)

[Tim Jensen @TimGoose3]

Dead medium

[Tim Jensen @TimGoose3]

@DodgersNation No chance. Please god know.

[Tim Jensen @TimGoose3]

Should’ve left Tanner Scott at home.

[Dodgers Nation @DodgersNation]

🚨🚨 NLDS ROSTER: Clayton Kershaw is BACK, but TWO relievers are left off for the best-of-five series ⬇️🔗

https://t.co/b69Uyl8Cpg

[Tim Jensen @TimGoose3]

@Mike_kim714 In

[Michael S. Kim @Mike_kim714]

Giving away my Titleist staff bag that I used from the Open Champ to the BMW I believe.

Must be a follower

Comment, like, retweet for a chance to win!

[Tim Jensen @TimGoose3]

Yet no one cares

[Fore Play @ForePlayPod]

Rahm vs. Bryson going to a playoff for the LIV team title… Little Ryder Cup preview to cap off the night? 👀

[Tim Jensen @TimGoose3]

The Clipper jersey.

[Legion Hoops @LegionHoops]

Who’s stopping this team?