🚨 BREAKING: The UAAP has officially banned women over 40 and all Visayan attendees from the Ateneo-UST game.
Arena security is strictly enforcing the ban using a mandatory vowel-swap audio test at the turnstiles. Guards will ask female attendees to say the words "Eleven" and "Internet." Anyone caught effortlessly saying "Ilibin" or "Enternet" shall have their tickets immediately revoked.