Tatooooom

I'm blunt bc God rolled me that way

[𐌁𐌉Ᏽ 𐌕𐌉𐌌𐌉 @OrevaZSN]

Why don’t we pronounce the “meow” in homeowner?

[eo @eeeeow]

To me "I said" is a direct quote as it was delivered in the moment and "I was like" is a general paraphrasing of what I said that may include my interior emotional response plus the general unspoken vibe of the interaction

[H (Mundial ERA) @Petrichor_BH]

La celebración mas heterosexual entre futbolistas

[lesbica demoniaca⚢ @lesmastoxicas]

melhor lembrar oq aconteceu com teu pais da última vez que ficaram do lado da Alemanha

[Marie🧚 @glitchu__]

Shopping isn’t exciting anymore. Everything is overpriced, terrible quality, & ugly.

[Czarina @fishontherun02]

Hi! 👋 Child of a landlord here. My stepfather isn’t using your rent money to improve your unit—that driveway is never getting fixed. He’s in Amsterdam *right now* doing mushrooms in a $600/night Airbnb.

[Zarish @Zarish5062]

“A postpartum mom doesn’t need you to hold her baby so she can catch up on chores. She needs you to do the chores so she can hold her baby”

[Mzsweetcakes aka Sweetz 🍭🫧 ♑️🦅🦅🦅 @Mzsweetcakes08]

Having a good day as an adult is literally:
• got paid
• ate something good
• nobody annoyed me
• went home”

[qɐɥԀ @phabamar]

Me hosting a visitor at my spot

[JAY 💞 @Janiee_Jayy]

I'm actually a natural moaner. I don't know why people assume moaning only happens during sex. Moaning is a great way of relieving all kinds of feelings. I moan when I'm tired, hungry, when I just wake up, when I'm stretching, when I'm crying, and even when I'm laughing.

[Montgomery County Department of Police @mcpnews]

A little knowledge can bring them home. 💙

Every year, children become separated from their parents in stores, parks, events, and public places. In those moments, knowing a few important details can make all the difference.

Teach your child:

✔ Mom and Dad's real names (not just "Mom" and "Dad")
✔ A parent or guardian's phone number
✔ Their home address, if age-appropriate
✔ How to identify a safe adult, such as a police officer, security guard, or employee.

Whether you're at a park, festival, shopping center, or on vacation, these simple lessons can help reunite families faster and keep children safe.

Make it a game. Practice often. Review regularly.

A few minutes today could help your child stay safe tomorrow.

#MCPNews #MCPD

[Tara Palmeri @tarapalmeri]

“Politics has really, really endangered a lot of women’s lives.” — Kat Cammack

Words you rarely hear from a MAGA pro-life congresswoman discussing the abortion procedure that saved her life.

[Andrew Hilary🇵🇸 @AndrewHilaryUS]

I’m not even kidding you guys, the reflecting pool is my favorite story of the entire year so far. This gift just keeps on GIVING

[∿ @somewheresy]

How bad is your life dude

[Torren @Torren__]

Vas a la cocina a por una cerveza y de repente el comentarista empieza a hablar más alto.

[MileyCyrus PRESS @CyrusPRESS]

Miley Cyrus’s boyfriend Max revealed that after marriage, he plans to take her last name instead of asking her to change.

“She’s built an iconic name and brand since she was 12, it would be wrong to ask her to give that up. I’d rather take her name and stand behind her legacy.”

[t. @taeseru]

mind you this is romantic af

[Clash Report @clashreport]

Hunter Biden on his father pardoning him:

He chose me over his legacy, because no matter what you say, that's going to be one of the first things written about him.

He chose me over his political legacy.

And that's how much my dad loves me.

[Nature Unedited @NatureUnedited]

A raccoon figured out that if he blocks the drive-thru, they’ll give him a donut to make him leave