Ultraindigo

[Julz @T0xic__AF]

the best things in life are none of your fucking business

[Ultraindigo @Ultraindigo8]

@silkymilky14 @LorazeKim Establish instant cred at your destination by arriving on a bicycle.

[Ultraindigo @Ultraindigo8]

@Outkick This is the. schtoooopidest thing that anyone has said on this platform since it opened as Twitter in 2007.

[Slim Plimsoll @slimplimsoll]

I’m not crazy I’m big-boned.

[Slim Plimsoll @slimplimsoll]

Nobody on Twitter knows my real name, so I’ve decided to stop asking.

[Natalie Would @_NatalieWould]

Aren't non drinkers in a bigger need of a support group?

[Ultraindigo @Ultraindigo8]

@deloisivete Let's face it, we all peaked in high school.

[Ultraindigo @Ultraindigo8]

@NaemiHan Bird outside me window: cheap cheap cheap
Me: I'm not cheap. I'm just careful with my money, OK?
Bird: cheap cheap
Me: Alright, fine, I'm cheap.

[Næmï on Mars @NaemiHan]

Little birdy told me something I dunno what I don't speak bird

[Ultraindigo @Ultraindigo8]

@ThrillaRilla369 Hear me out.
1. WNBA recruits a Mexican team and renames itself the IBA (International Basketball Association)(CA, US, MX)
2. Huge ratings on Telemundo etc. etc..
3. If men want to follow suit, they'd have to call it the MIBA.

[Ultraindigo @Ultraindigo8]

@loveherlethergo Wait! You can scratch things off your bucket list without doing them?

[Næmï on Mars @NaemiHan]

Out of the whole animal kingdom I'd hate to be the bear of bad news

[Ultraindigo @Ultraindigo8]

@NaemiHan I ain't lion for nobody.

[Næmï on Mars @NaemiHan]

Creeping up with the doordashians

[Ultraindigo @Ultraindigo8]

@wetsentence @NaemiHan Is it wrong to aspire to being ignored in life and forgotten in death? I sure hope not.

[Ultraindigo @Ultraindigo8]

@AtheistPhoenix @NaemiHan [Klunk]
H: JEEsus!
M: He can't help you now. He's been dead for 2000 years.

[Ultraindigo @Ultraindigo8]

@MadHatterMommy I like playing sports; not that into watching other people play sports. REALLY not into watching people talk about other people playing stuff.

[Maddy 👗👟👒🍃☂️ @MadHatterMommy]

Wish I could care about football

[42_in_londonn @41_in_londonn]

hippos are herbivores so when they attack you, they have no interest in eating you, they just hate you on a personal level. i respect that.

[Ultraindigo @Ultraindigo8]

@zionszzn And a 10W bulb is really a 40W bulb but my favorite 🙄 is the weather clowns who grudgingly tell you the real temperature but insist on blathering what they think it "feels like" based on humidity. News flash: There is ALWAYS humidity. So, if it reads 84, then it FEELS like 84.