Velvet Steel

Proud purveyor of fine tin foil headwear

[Angie B @Angibangie]

I really hope these emotions are from PMS and I'm not like 'growing as a person' or some bullshit like that.

[Spin Spin Sugah @BlondAmbitionTO]

The best way to make me mad, when I'm not mad at all, is to repeatedly ask me, "are you mad?"

[Just Bill @WilliamAder]

Found out today you cannot join a gym "just to watch".

[Lounge Fly @mrjohntofu]

Do you have a sponsor?

- Me, flirting.

[Rock @TheMichaelRock]

14yo: Can you take me to see the new Ghostbusters movie?

Me: Get out of my house right now.

[Velvet Steel @Velvet_Steele]

I think my neighbors own a howitzer

[Abe Yospe @Cheeseboy22]

Swiss Family Robinson taught me that the best way to kill your enemies is a coconut bomb, followed closely by a secret pit with a tiger.

[Wilde Thingy @wildethingy]

I wish young people would stop idealising future dystopias and start enjoying the one they're in.

[CHRIS 👍not far right, just right @GoBurgo]

My parents never did teach adult. Just how to keep plastic bags inside plastic bags, and if there is a person in the house, you feed them..

[🇨🇦 👠taste my trixie🇨🇦 @trixiebellbell]

sundays just aren't sundays without the simpsons.

[meatshirt @prettysadmostly]

excuse me sir i noticed you kicked over a shopping cart and threw trash on the ground im your wife now

[Daz? @HomeProbably]

How do you follow your dreams when you have insomnia?