Very Evangelical Problems

spiritual etiquette for the evangelical classes

[Very Evangelical Problems @VeryEvangelical]

So who’s up for a bit of @WordAliveEvent bingo?
I think I nearly got a full house today! @10ofthose
#WordAliveEvent2018 #Christians #Conferences #bingo #withlove

[Very Evangelical Problems @VeryEvangelical]

That moment in a prayer meeting when your mobile goes off. And you remember it’s set to “Highway to Hell” by AC/DC #truestory

[Very Evangelical Problems @VeryEvangelical]

That moment when you’re reading aloud in home group bible study and mispronounce “Gentiles” as “Genitals” 😬😬😬😬

[Very Evangelical Problems @VeryEvangelical]

On the flip side...
#christian #christianculture #drums #organ #oldvsnew

[Very Evangelical Problems @VeryEvangelical]

When you accidentally let your inner monologue of “dontdropitdontdoputdontdropitDONT DROP IT” slip out when passing the tray of communion wine...
#Christians #Problems #communion #dontdropit

[Very Evangelical Problems @VeryEvangelical]

Quick PSA Announcement for all churches. It’s easily done. The more you know...#churches #drums #HolySpirit

[Bad Church Secertary @ChruchSecretary]

Time for one of my favorite games.
"Guess the unspoken prayer request."

[Matt Smethurst @MattSmethurst]

Then Peter said to him, “Lord, how long must we sing the ‘Oceans’ chorus? As many as seven times?”

Jesus replied, “I do not say to you seven times, but 77 times.”

On hearing it, his disciples said, “This is a hard teaching. Who can accept it?” And many walked away sad.

[Very Evangelical Problems @VeryEvangelical]

@postieprice Clearly brother. That resurrection power didn’t quite clear out my negative energy the first time round. 😂

[Very Evangelical Problems @VeryEvangelical]

Everyone knows one of these...😱😱😱 smh...😂😂😂

[Very Evangelical Problems @VeryEvangelical]

@KSPrior Praying 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽❣️

[Very Evangelical Problems @VeryEvangelical]

When someone earnestly corners you after church and with a gleam in their eye and begins the conversation
“Well you see Israel has a very special...”
RUN RUN RUN AWAY AND DON’T LOOK BACK

[Lloyd Legalist @LloydLegalist]

When you have an argument with another believer, politely agree to disagree and then hand them over to Satan for the destruction of their flesh.

[Very Evangelical Problems @VeryEvangelical]

Sometimes obeying God can be a real buzzkill 🤦🏻‍♀️😂😂😂😜

Overheard at a Christian conference:- Man wistfully sighs and turns to his friend after walking past a BMW
“that’s the car I was going to buy until I just got taught to give all my money away”
#christianconference

[Very Evangelical Problems @VeryEvangelical]

@Knitchings Difficult choice. Larger checks are generally more Evangelical, if you head towards narrow coloured check with a wool jumper that’s deffo Anglican territory

[Very Evangelical Problems @VeryEvangelical]

@abrahamified Yass brother. Pods are an environmental nuisance. Have just switched up myself to a stove top percolator for use with grounds!

[John Crist @johnbcrist]

“Devils food cake? Not in this house.” - my mom https://t.co/xCWITkdqtR

[Very Evangelical Problems @VeryEvangelical]

@glenscrivener Scrolls are most obvious on white background. But I do love the teal!

[Very Evangelical Problems @VeryEvangelical]

@hipsterlutheran Preach brother 🙌🏼

[Very Evangelical Problems @VeryEvangelical]

@johnjvatcher50 @postieprice Hmmm, I believe there’s an obligatory “dodgems” round where you both stop and start an unspecified number of times, until one gives away with a “you first” murmur. But this could just be Free Evangelicals. There could be a culture difference for say Methodists to Baptists.

[Very Evangelical Problems @VeryEvangelical]

That moment when you accidentally start your prayer at the exact same moment as someone else in the open prayer slot, thus creating a “prayer dodgems” situation so excruciating that you have to move church immediately.
#british #reserve #sociallyawkward #evangelicals

[Very Evangelical Problems @VeryEvangelical]

@postieprice At least they are happily ignorant! But as for everyone else, the passive embarrassment would warrant a change in country at least. 😬😬😬😜