Johnkemp

[Johnkemp @VictorTraps]

@joeroganhq Whale therapist

[Josh Denny @JoshDenny]

Philanthropy isn't a personal trait, but a privilege. It's a natural byproduct of no longer having to question your own ability to survive.

[Funny Or Die @funnyordie]

Try saying it! It really is a lot of fun. #GOPDebate

[Johnkemp @VictorTraps]

Chris Christie gets a boner every time the audience applauds at his bullshit #GOPDebate

[Patton Oswalt @pattonoswalt]

I will vote for the first candidate who names "tentacle porn" as his or her weakness. #GOPDebate

[Jimmy Dore @jimmy_dore]

Be very careful when you ask Carson a question – it’s dangerous to wake a sleep walker.
#GOPDebate

[Patton Oswalt @pattonoswalt]

Carly Fiorina's hair would reduce concussions in the NFL by 80%. #GOPDebate

[Johnkemp @VictorTraps]

@billburr here is your Duracell: http://t.co/GKOxSJl98R

[Brian Greene @bgreene]

How often have you noticed that a coincidence didn’t happen?

[Johnkemp @VictorTraps]

Hey Gabey, know what?
I love you more than all the
Questions you can ask.

[Johnkemp @VictorTraps]

I helped invent this kid. He will be 10 tomorrow. No other male gendered individual has taught me more… http://t.co/6gzzNdUBBq

[Johnkemp @VictorTraps]

@kayzeezee I will kill you at haiku competition. Just like I kill you at the intimate stuff.

[Johnkemp @VictorTraps]

@kayzeezee what the hell is with the hyphens. I don't get it. Go to sleep and get ready to teach people's babies.

[Johnkemp @VictorTraps]

Oh the sleepy thoughts
Turned into twittered posts
I trump your tweet tweet. @kayzeezee

[Johnkemp @VictorTraps]

@kayzeezee https://t.co/QsdXDIu7kf

[Johnkemp @VictorTraps]

@shannoncason

[Johnkemp @VictorTraps]

@shannoncason Thanks Shannon. Much appreciated.

[Johnkemp @VictorTraps]

@shannoncason

[Johnkemp @VictorTraps]

#sothishappened #krhissy http://t.co/kf7vtJxL8S