William A. Pompion

Businessman. Master of sashaying jackassery. Would kill a guy for a hot bath right about now.

[William A. Pompion @WPompion]

Can anyone guess

[Nieltown @nieltown]

You can be a silly billy or you can be a Serious William. Up to you

[William A. Pompion @WPompion]

I dunno, like, if you're mean, just own it, you absolute idiot. 🥰

[William A. Pompion @WPompion]

Why are people so mean?

(Hahahahahahahaahhahaaaaaaahahahahwqqhqhhqhqhdhdddjkx)

[William A. Pompion @WPompion]

I'm a fictional character #MyTwitterAnniversary

[William A. Pompion @WPompion]

🎶I walked into the party, like I was walking onto a yacht*🎶

*seasick and didn't want to be there in the first place

[William A. Pompion @WPompion]

How did this get here

[William A. Pompion @WPompion]

Pompi-ON, Pompi-OFF.

...🖤

[William A. Pompion @WPompion]

no

[William A. Pompion @WPompion]

@iamapumpkin I know that was meant to insult me, but it fits so fuck you

[William A. Pompion @WPompion]

@iamapumpkin Why didn't you just threaten them? If it were my sofa purchase, it would have already been there when I got home.

[William A. Pompion @WPompion]

@iamapumpkin Go sit on your Eldon sofa

[William A. Pompion @WPompion]

@iamapumpkin Don't you mean, "You're you're a jerk jerk you're a jerk?"

[William A. Pompion @WPompion]

@iamapumpkin You're embarrassing

[William A. Pompion @WPompion]

Batthwack threw a staircase at me last night.

[William A. Pompion @WPompion]

https://t.co/mifzyikFwb

🤷‍♂️

[William A. Pompion @WPompion]

@thagwen @yummypancake Ok cool - if my milkshake brings anyone, I will point them in your direction. 🤝

[William A. Pompion @WPompion]

@yummypancake Also, I could teach you, but I'd have to charge.

[William A. Pompion @WPompion]

@yummypancake Only 404 pages? Lame. The book I wrote about contracts has 587 pages and the font is size 1.

[William A. Pompion @WPompion]

@yummypancake That hair is on fleek

[William A. Pompion @WPompion]

@thagwen I have to protect myself from the purity somehow! #mentalblock 😬 But you're right, at least you're better at secret plans than Batthwack is.

[William A. Pompion @WPompion]

What a strange, strange world we live in
Where the good are damned and the wicked forgiven

(-Regina Spektor)